King of Thieves
by fyre
Summary: Hermes wants to pay Iolaus and Autolycus back for stealing his winged sandals, but the god's plan may get Iolaus in more trouble than he can handle.


KING OF THEIVES

by fyre

FEEDBACK: a_sayyar2118@hotmail.com

TEASER: Hermes wants to pay Iolaus and Autolycus back for stealing his winged sandals, but the god's plan may get Iolaus in more trouble than he can handle

ARCHIVE: Less than Legendary Journeys http://www.rtis.com/nat/user/chimera/legends.htm Everyone else please ask.

TIME LINE/CATEGORY: Between Seasons 4 and 5

RATING: PG-13 Some language.

DISCLAIMER: No major plot-lines, characters, setting, or major events alluded to in this story are mine in any way. No money is being made off this story. Please ask author before reproducing or posing anywhere else. 

NOTES: I'm dyslexic so any grammar or spelling mistakes that got by I humbly apologize for. Either that or they are intentional for sake of higher semantic meaning, syntax be hanged! I don't believe people think or talk in perfectly grammatical sentences so deal. grin

*****

CRASH

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, OW!"

Hercules watched with an amused smile on his face as his friend, Iolaus hopped up and down like a jack rabbit.

"Well are you just going to sit there or are you going to help me, oh Mighty son of Zeus?" Iolaus demanded.

Suppressing a laugh, Hercules bent over to help his friend clean up the mess he'd caused all over the tavern floor.

"So much for lunch," Hercules teased.

"This is not my fault Herc." Iolaus hissed in pain, rubbing his sore foot "Something tripped me."

"Things have been tripping you for the last couple of days. If I didn't know better I'd say you were Joxer in disguise."

Iolaus' eyes snapped up angrily. "Hey! That was low."

Hercules held up his hands in apology. "Hey I'm sorry but even you have to admit that you've been more than a little accident prone this week."

Handing a tray full of broken plates and mugs to a passing barmaid and dusting himself off, Iolaus plopped down onto the bench with a sigh. "I'm really beginning to feel as if I'm cursed Herc," the hunter moaned. Suddenly his head snapped up. "Cursed," he repeated again with a growing realization. "That's gotta be it! One of your divine relatives has it in for me and now I can't even walk across the tavern without nearly killing myself."

"Seeing gods behind every tree Iolaus? Isn't that my job?" Hercules asked with good-natured skepticism as he took his seat.

"Oh right, when you scream "god at work" you're telling the truth, but when I say it it's paranoia?" 

"Who could possibly want to make you accident prone Iolaus? It's too . . . benign for Ares or Hera."

"Maybe Aphrodite," the hunter mused. "Or Artemis or Athena. Those two never really got over me picking Aphrodite over one of them. Whattaya' think Herc?"

"I think you're overestimating your importance juuuust a bit," Hercules teased, but instead of bringing Iolaus out of his mood the hunter shot him a murderous look. "I'm kidding Iolaus! I'm just kidding!"

the demigod put in, raising his hands in surrender.

Iolaus looked only slightly mollified. "Thanks for your help 'buddy.' I can always count on you when I'm in a scrape."

"C'mon, Iolaus," Hercules pleaded nudging him in the shoulder. "Just forget it. I'm sure it's not your fault, and I'm sure it'll go away."

"Well I'm glad you're confident about it." Iolaus groused as he motioned for the barmaid to bring them something to eat, not trusting himself to get up and get it himself.

"Look why don't we get lunch to go and start heading for Calydon right now?"

"Is Daedalus that eager for us to get there?" Iolaus asked taking his drink from the girl with a nod and sipping it slowly.

"His message said it was urgent," Hercules replied taking the scroll from his belt and tapping it idly against the table. "I just hope he hasn't gotten himself into trouble with his inventions again."

"All right. Let get lunch to go. As long as it's not falafel or tacos." Iolaus put in hastily as he rose. "The last thing I need on top of everything is a stomach ache."

The two heroes left Cardia and headed southwest towards Calydon, eating as they went.

It was midafternoon when they reached the crossroads at Mysia however. Iolaus managed not only to stub his toe along the way, but nearly fell off a rope bridge into a swollen river, practically got run over by a passing chariot, and was attacked by a hornets nest as well.

"This is insane!" Iolaus wailed as they outdistanced the hornets. "Now do you believe me? This is not paranoia, Herc. Someone is out to get me!"

Hercules had to admit that this was getting a little strange. Everything that had happened seemed to focus destructive intentions directly on Iolaus.

"Okay you're right." Hercules conceded as they slowed to a walk again, understandably out of breath. "This is obviously no coincidence. But the question is who? And why?"

"Well we better find the answer quick before whoever it is kills me!" Iolaus replied gingerly plucking hornet stingers from his arms.

"We are nearly at Calydon, we should be there by nightfall. Tomorrow is soon enough to find out what in Hades name is going on and get it fixed." Hercules assured his friend as they took the left path.

Suddenly, as if struck by lighting, Iolaus stopped.

"Iolaus? What is it?" Hercules asked wondering what danger the hunter's keen senses were warning him about now.

Iolaus blinked for a moment and then strode over to the cairn of rocks at the center of the fork. He circled it once, then again and finally it hit him.

"HERMES!" He cried turning back towards the demigod. "It's that winged footed, badly dressed brother of yours. He's behind all of this. I should have known!" Iolaus moaned.

"Hermes?" Hercules thought for a moment and then nodded. "Yeah this sounds like him. But why would he be playing all these tricks on you? What did you do to him?"

"What did _*I*_ do?! Suddenly this is *_my_* fault?! I didn't do anythi-!" Iolaus broke off his tirade with a suddenness that filled the air with silence. The hunter's eyes widened as he thought back to the little prank he and Autolycus had played on the Trickster god only a month ago to help Hercules, who at the time wasn't himself, so to speak. "Oh no," he whispered.

"'Oh no' what?" Hercules asked suspiciously.

Iolaus let out a nervous giggle. "Oh, nothing, Herc. Nothing at all."

"Do you know why he's after you, Iolaus?" Hercules asked in a no nonsense tone of voice, hands on his hips.

"Uh . . . maybe?" Iolaus offered tentatively not looking his friend in the eye.

"Well then let's get him here and clear this whole mess up before a wild boar, half a dozen nymphs, and the sky fall down on you." Hercules said throwing up his hands with a mock sigh as he moved over to the cairn and called out his brother's name.

Iolaus and the demigod waited for a long moment, but nothing happened.

"HERMES! GET DOWN HERE!" Hercules tried again.

"Maybe he's busy delivering messages?" The hunter said with a weak laugh.

"No, he would usually show up and confess to his tricks. He likes to brag about them," Hercules replied as he scanned the sky. "Are you sure it's Hermes who might be responsible?"

Iolaus nodded fervently.

"And dare I ask what you did to him?" Hercules prodded with a strained voice rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"It's a loooong story." Iolaus said with a sigh.

"I figured as much." Hercules said trying to hide his smile. He knew it would only encourage his friend if he saw it. And the last thing he wanted to do was encourage Iolaus to get into MORE trouble. The hunter found plenty even when he was being careful "Look we need to get to Calydon quickly, but you really need to get this straightened out before we help Daedalus with whatever mess his inventions have gotten him into this time. Why don't you head for Mysia? Hermes has a temple there. I'm sure you

could reach him there."

"Okay," Iolaus said with a sigh "I'll head over to Mysia and then meet you in Calydon as soon as I'm done."

"If you don't join me there in two days, I'm coming after you. So you be careful. Hermes can play rough."

"Don't I know it." Iolaus said with a smile as the two of them clasped arms and then headed off down different paths.

As Hercules entered the town of Calydon a familiar looking woman ran up to greet him.

"Cassandra!" he exclaimed, hugging the slim brunette. "What are you doing here?"

"I live around here now, and I actually come into town once in a while now that I know I'm no longer considered an outsider like I was on Atlantis."

"I'm glad things are going well for you. Did you know I was coming?" he teased remembering her powers of foresight.

"Actually yes I did." Cassandra said, her voice serious as they walked through the market.

"No dreams of mass destruction I hope."

"No Hercules only dreams of war and turmoil. Which, when you think about t is pretty much the same thing. A storm is breaking, I can feel it." Cassandra said shivering and rubbing her arms in vain to

alleviate the cold she felt inside. "Why are you here Hercules?"

Hercules brandished a scroll for her to see. "I received a message from a friend of mine, an inventor named Daedalus. I hope he's not involved in whatever you're feeling."

"Why would he be?" Cassandra questioned worriedly as she followed behind Hercules who was threading his way through the crowds.

"Daedalus is a genius and he always tried to use his inventions for good, but after his son Icarus died using one of them he lost his way for a while and started making weapons. Last time we saw each other I managed to stop his supposed "doomsday" device."

"Is he still making weapons? I don't ever want to see another Atlantis."

"When I left him he was preparing to work on projects that helped people not hurt them. And then about a week ago I got a message saying he needed my help." Hercules explained.

Finally locating the inventors residence just by the strange sounds that came from within Hercules turned to Cassandra. "You can come with me if you want. I could use your sight if there really is trouble."

Steeling herself Cassandra nodded. "Okay."

Iolaus made good time to Mysia. Surprisingly no disasters followed in his wake. Taking the temple steps two at a time, he bounded to the entrance hand clasped firmly on his sword. Opening the door slowly, he was unsurprised to find the shrine devoid of people. Hermes' followers did not take the form of priests or priestesses but as thieves, merchants, travelers, politicians and all those who lived by their wits.

Iolaus had once been a thief in his youth and hadn't been one to pray then anymore than he was now. Still there was unfinished business between him and the trickster so he might as well get it over with and catch up to Hercules in Calydon.

"Hermes?" the hunter called out tentatively, his light tenor echoing around the room. "Umm, how've you been? Everything okay with the messenger job?" Iolaus looked around waiting for some sign of the presence of the god. Feeling a little foolish to be talking to an empty room he pressed on quickly. "Look, you might be wondering why I'm here-"

"Actually I know exactly why you're here Iolaus." a voice intruded from behind him.

Instincts blazing the hunter whirled around to face whoever had spoken, when his brain caught up and reminded him that it could be only one person. Or more specifically, one god.

"Hermes."

"Iolaus, so good of you to drop in. I don't get many visitors like my other brothers and sisters."

"Like I had a choice!" Iolaus retorted. "This is about the mud bath facial thing isn't it." the hunter stated knowingly.

"'Mud bath facial thing?'" Hermes growled "Mud bath facial thing'? Is that how you so fondly remember it?"

Running his hands through his hair in frustration Iolaus took to pacing. "Look I didn't want to take your sandals but I didn't have much of a choice. In case you've conveniently forgotten my best friend was a pig at the time!"

"Did you ever think of it from MY perspective?" Hermes asked archly.

"Your perspective?" Iolaus repeated slightly bewildered as he halted his steps. "You're a god, we didn't hurt you!"

"Yes I am a god," Hermes agreed angrily coming closer to the hunter "the god of thieves and tricksters, and I'm conned and victimized by two of MY OWN **STUDENTS!!! **Do you know what it's like to return to Olympus every day and have the other gods laughing at the absurdity of it all?! DO you?!" he demanded poking Iolaus hard in the chest.

"ahh . . . No." the mortal replied softly.

"It's horrible." Hermes admitted mournfully. "Here I thought I was getting a beauty treatment, and you and Autolycus just wanted to steal my sandals. It wasn't even something dignified like, you captured me in a cage made by Hephaestus and then stole my sandals or something like that!" he said fluttering his hands like mad birds trying to paint the picture for Iolaus "Oh no, you had to play up to my vanity, my astounding good looks, my-"

"Look Hermes," Iolaus reached out to stop the immortals frantic waving before he got sick. "I'm really sorry that I did this. I didn't realize how difficult it was for you. And I understand how you must not like me very much, but I was only trying to help my best friend, YOUR brother from some stupid trick pulled by Discord and Ares. So why don't you go and make their lives miserable, huh?"

"That's why your here." Hermes replied collecting himself suddenly, pulling his hands out of the hunter's grasp.

"Excuse me?"

"That's why I've been playing all those tricks on you." the god explained again.

"I . . don't follow."

Sighing in frustration, Hermes flittered over to his alter and reclined on top of it. "Listen, I'm sure Aphrodite or some other god would be touched by your heartfelt apology but I require something 

more . . . substantial." he said gesturing with his snake wand

"Substantial?" the hunter asked warily eyeing both the god and the snakes.

"Yes Iolaus. Now listen_ c a r e f u l y_." Hermes continued with exaggerated slowness "You, Iolaus are going to help me, Hermes get back at Ares, god of war, and Discord, AND at the same time pay for humiliating me. Got all that or do I have to spell it out for you?"

"Okay, okay, okay. I may be mortal but I'm not stupid!" Iolaus retorted angrily. "So." The hunter held up his hands and shrugged. "What do I have to do?"

"You" Hermes said, pointing at Iolaus with his wand. "Are going to take Autolycus' position as King of Thieves for . . . oh I don't know" the god said with theatrical vagueness "the next month or so and do exactly what I tell you to do!"

"Oh no." Iolaus said shaking his head with a chuckle "Very funny Hermes, but I'm not that easily tricked."

"I'm very serious Iolaus." Hermes said with a dangerously calm voice.

The mortal stared at the god and what he found in the trickster's eyes he didn't like. "No. " Iolaus said vehemently shaking his head as he backed away "No, no, no, no, NO! You have Autolycus for that, you don't need me. Besides I'm not a thief."

"You were once."

"That," Iolaus countered moving closer to the alter "was a long time ago."

"It's still in you." Hermes insisted with a knowing grin as he reclined even further, closing his eyes in peaceful repose. "Deny it all you like, but it's still there." 

"This is insane!" Iolaus announced loudly throwing his hands up in disgust. "I can't just drop everything to appease your ego and take over Autolycus. First of all because I'm not a thief." Iolaus began counting

off reasons on his fingers. "Second, I've got to meet back up with Hercules in Calydon. Third, Autolycus will have my ears if I steal his job. Fourth . . . fourth . . ." he sputtered, running out of steam "well there

is no fourth, but three reasons should be enough!" he protested at last.

"Well if it's reasons you want, then fine!" Hermes snapped, patience waning as he sat up on his alter to face Iolaus. "First, this is punishment so I can't just give the job to Autolycus. Second, for what I have in mind, I need the last person anyone would suspect, namely you. Third, this is for a good cause, specifically getting back at Ares and Discord who were responsible in the first place. And fourth, and most importantly, I'm a god. So it's four to three, I win."

"Your fourth reason doesn't count!" Iolaus argued.

"Yes it does!" Hermes countered hopping off the alter and glaring down at the mortal. "Because I can and will make your life a living Tartarus unless you agree."

Gritting his teeth Iolaus glared back for a long moment. Then taking a deep breath to calm himself he nodded curtly. "Okay. I'll do what you want, but ONLY to get back at Ares and Discord." Iolaus warned the trickster. "I'm not going to go around stealing from innocent people!"

"I wouldn't dream of it." Hermes assured him, looking hurt that Iolaus would even suggest such a thing.

Rubbing his neck ruefully Iolaus sank to the ground leaning against a convenient pillar and crossed his arms. "So, what do you want me to steal?"

"Daedalus? Are you home?" Hercules called as he knocked on the scientists door.

A few moments passed and Hercules and Cassandra could hear someone move a bar away from the entrance. With that, the door swung open letting out a puff of dust, smoke, and steam. Coughing and teary eyed, Hercules tried to dispel the cloud by waving his hands about when suddenly someone grasped his wrist and started shaking it.

"Hercules!" A familiar voice greeted with obvious relief. "I'm so glad you came! Come in! Come in!"

"Daedalus?" Hercules gasped, trying to make out the inventor in all the smoke. "Do you mind if we talk outside?"

"Of course, of course!" With that, the old man closed the door behind him, trapping the noxious cloud safely inside.

"Cassandra are you all right?" Hercules asked as soon as he was able to draw in a decent breath of air.

"S-s-sure!" the woman coughed leaning on the demigod for support.

"Daedalus, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine Cassandra. Cassandra, this is Daedalus."

"Well it is very nice to meet you, my dear." the inventor said taking her hand but not before wiping his off on a leather apron. The seer nodded in response as she caught her breath.

"What are you doing in there?" Hercules asked.

"More importantly," Cassandra put, in at last able to speak without dying "how do you breath in there?"

"Oh that's the point!" Daedalus explained. "I'm trying to find a way to filter out agents in the air so that people like miners, for example can go down deeper without having problems with foul air. You see, it's based on the idea that-"

"Daedalus," Hercules cut him off as politely as possible as the inventor was about to expand into one of his long-winded, highly complicated, barely understandable speeches. "You said you needed my help with something?"

"Oh, yes, yes. Indeed I do." Daedalus replied, suddenly serious as he quickly took off his soiled apron and tossed it back into his lab, causing yet another round of coughing from Cassandra and Hercules. The old man turned his attention back to his friend, fear evident in his eyes "You see Hercules, someone has stolen some of my old inventions."

"Here, these are for you." Hermes waved his wand and unceremoniously dropped a leather bound bundle into Iolaus' lap.

"What is it?" the hunter asked curiously as he unwrapped the package. "Is it some kind of- hey! I recognize these!" Iolaus stood up quickly and turned to the trickster. "This is Autolycus' grappling hook, and his set of lockpicks. Where did you get these?"

"I stole them from him, obviously!" Hermes snorted in amusement at the mortal's ignorance.

"But he's the King of Thieves."

"He USED to be the King of Thieves." Hermes clarified with a raised hand. "Now YOU are the King of Thieves. Are we all on the same scroll now?" The hunter shot him a dirty look that faded to one of slight concern.

"What exactly did you do to . . . punish Autolycus?" Iolaus asked warily.

"I just put him out of the way for a while." Hermes said vaguely, but catching Iolaus' less than pleased glance he sighed and threw up his hands in exasperation. "I didn't HURT him for Zeus' sake! I'm not going to hurt one of my leading followers. That would be a waste of resources."

"I'm glad you think so highly of us all." Iolaus retorted to himself, as he fingered the grappling hook.

"Look," Hermes said, choosing to ignore the comment and try to focus on the topic at hand as he turned from the mortal. "Ares is, at this time, preparing to give some of his warlords some very new, very big, very *_powerful* _weapons. He's got several minor wars going on in the peninsula, the mainland, and one in Ionia. With these weapons they could turn into a major offensive giving Ares a great deal of power as a result of the slaughter." Hermes glanced back to see if the hunter was paying attention and found to his surprise Iolaus was listening and taking the situation seriously. "Now, I can't directly foil a war, it's outside the scope of my influence, but . . ." he trailed of suggestively.

"But someone, one of your followers," Iolaus interjected a growing grin on his face. "Could stop the whole thing by stealing the weapons."

"Not just the weapons or more specifically their energy source, but the plans for them as well." Hermes clarified as he walked closer to the mortal. "You know as well as I do how angry Ares gets when a war doesn't go the way he plans. We'll have him running around in circles looking for the culprits and the weapons." Hermes finished with a matching smile on his face.

"You know," Iolaus began slowly, looking at the lockpicks and avoiding Hermes gaze in an effort to hide his delight in the plan. "I've always helped stop a war by bashing heads or talking; I've never done anything like this before. I think . . . I think driving Ares crazy might be just what the Fates ordered. After all," he reasoned "he chained me to Autolycus and had everyone think we were monsters. I owe him as much as you do." Iolaus admitted, finally looking at the trickster with a mischievous smile tugging at his lips. "Let's do it."

"Someone stole your work?" Hercules asked askance. "Your weapon plans?"

"Yes." Daedalus admitted shamefaced as they walked through the square, already lit with torches in anticipation of fast approaching night. "I was hoping to use some of the same principles in the weapons for some new inventions, ones that helped people."

"When did you notice them missing?" Hercules quarried.

"About a nine days ago. I'd locked up my house and had gone to the market for a few odds and ends. I'm very tight with security. When I returned the door was still locked the windows closed, everything undisturbed, but all of my papers were missing along with a few power crystals."

"Crystals?" Cassandra put in wide eyed. "Like the ones from Atlantis?" he asked Hercules worriedly as the trio found seats around the edge of the fountain in the town square.

"Atlantis, the fabled lost city?" Daedalus turned his attention away from Hercules and now regarded the girl with some interest. "What do you know about Atlantis?"

"I was born there." Cassandra replied cautiously. "And I was the only native to get off alive with Hercules' help."

"Is it true that they had all sorts of crystal inventions?" Daedalus pressed not noticing Cassandra's obvious reluctance to talk about the island. "What sort of energy harnessing did they use? Where they only used as weapons or did they-?"

"Listen mister," Cassandra finally cut him off harshly rising to her feet in anger to face the man. "These advanced people destroyed themselves with their "inventions," persecuted my father and myself, killed innocent people, and made slaves out of anyone they found washed up on the shore. Inventions made then heartless, cruel-"

"Whoa! Hold on a minute." Hercules interjected taking hold of Cassandra's arm and pressing her back into sitting beside him. "Daedalus' inventions are not like that. Not anymore." he assured the brunette.

"What about what I told you I saw?" Cassandra countered in a whisper. "The rising storm of destruction. It could very well be his own work that creates the death I saw!"

"It's possible," Hercules conceded "But getting angry about it won't solve the problem. Now Daedalus," Hercules said turning his attention back to the old man who was looking properly subdued. "Do you have any idea who the thieves might be? Did they take anything else?"

"I don't know who it could possible be! I found nothing else missing, no windows broken or ajar. I am unable to determine just how they got it and out. Nothing was out of place."

"Perhaps it was the work of the gods you told me about Hercules." Cassandra put in, calmer now.

"The only god who would want such weapons is Ares and he would have chosen a more direct approach to getting them. Discord might have ordered someone to steal them however."

"I doubt it was the gods." Daedalus said shaking his head. "It's not very scientific to attribute all random phenomenon to deities."

"It may not be scientific, but it is often the case." Hercules replied bitterly. "Unfortunately it's not very probable that a good thief would be working for Discord. The only thief good enough to break into Daedalus' lab would be Autolycus, and even he's not that stupid."

"So what are we going to do?" Cassandra asked at last throwing up her hands in disgust. "We can't just sit here while someone has dangerous and deadly weapons and crystals in their hands."

"There are a few warlords nearby. Ares does have several skirmishes going on near here. I'll just have to go and check them out." Hercules said slapping his knees and then getting to his feet.

"Are you leaving right away Hercules?" Daedalus queried as he to stood up.

"No, I'm going to wait for a friend of mine to catch up. He had . . . business in Mysia, but he was going to join me as soon as he could."

"You can stay at my place until he comes." Cassandra offered. "I'll have dinner ready in no time."

"Sounds good." Hercules agreed with a smile before holding out his had to Daedalus. "It was good to see you again."

"It was good to see you too Hercules. And thank you for helping."

"I haven't done anything yet." the demigod protested with a laugh.

"I know you will." the inventor said with calm assurance. "Be careful and good luck to you."

Hermes all but dropped Iolaus on the roof of the tavern.

"Hey watch it there!" Iolaus called out indignantly.

The trickster hovered before him, a look of innocence on his face. "Watch what?" he asked.

Sighing in frustration, Iolaus dusted himself off. "Well thanks for the lift anyways. Where are we?"

"That's not important yet." Hermes said waving his hand as if dismissing the question. "What is important is that." Iolaus followed the god's pointing finger to the shadowed gloom of a fortress. "There lies your first objective. Enter, get the papers, and get out."

"Then what?" Iolaus asked.

"You should be able to discover your next target by entering the fortress. You travel there and get what you need to get." Hermes explained with a shrug.

"How many of these targets are there? I mean if I have to do this in a month. . ." the hunter questioned cautiously.

"Do I look like the Oracle at Delphi? How'm I supposed to know?!" the god replied, patience fading fast.

"All right, all right. No need to get your wings in a spasm!" Iolaus muttered.

"Just remember, you are not Iolaus the hunter or Iolaus the hero, friend of Hercules. You are Iolaus, King of Thieves, so act like him."

"Wonderful. Shallow, insensitive, arrogant, vain . . . I'll be a paragon of virtue!"

"Sarcasm will not serve you now." Hermes remarked disapprovingly. "You got yourself into this mess, now you pay the price."

"What about Hercules?" Iolaus interjected. "He's expecting me at Calydon. How'm I going to explain this to him?"

"You're not, that's the point!" Hermes replied angrily. "How many times do I have to tell you mortals before it sticks in your heads? You are not pretending to be the King of Thieves! You ARE the King of Thieves. You may have a score to settle with Ares yourself, but being a god, my plan gets preference. This is punishment, retribution for the embarrassment you cause me! If Nemesis was still at her old job I would have hired her to go after you! As it is, this is much more satisfying."

"Hercules will come after me after tomorrow." Iolaus warned ignoring the god's outburst knowing it was just something the trickster needed to rant about and get off his chest.

"Look," Hermes relented at last in the face of the hunter's calm "I'll send a message for you, telling him not to worry, okay?" 

"Thank you." Iolaus said grudgingly.

"Now get going." Hermes said with an almost parental fondness. "I want to see what you remember."

"Don't forget the message to Herc." Iolaus called as he made his way down to the street.

"I won't." Hermes called as he rose in the night sky watching Iolaus' progress down the shadowed streets. His attention was drawn away from the mortal by the hissing of his snakes. "Hmm, yes?" he asked them 

distractedly. "Oh no," he replied after a moment to their hissing. "Sending a message to Hercules would ruin the fun. This is supposed to be a trick, remember? Mortals," he mused with a smile and a shake of his head. "So gullible, even Iolaus. You'd think he'd know better than to trust my word." 

"A month of servitude to Hermes." Iolaus mused to himself as he threaded his way silently through deserted streets towards the fortress. "Well it could be worse. At least I'm getting back at Ares for chaining me to Autolycus and having those villagers chase us like we were monsters."

Reaching the perimeter of the fortress wall Iolaus scanned the battlements for sentries. There were only four, an easy victory if a fight came, he thought as he reached for his sword. His fingers accidentally brushed the grappling hook that hung on his belt and the smile faded to a thoughtful expression. Thieves did not bust their way into a place, they did it through skill and subterfuge.

Abandoning the direct approached, and interest peaked at the possibilities of using other techniques for a simple recon mission, Iolaus made a careful circuit of the wall until he found what he was looking for.

The servants entrance to the main building did have an outside entrance that was slightly pitted and next to the garbage dump and only lightly guarded as a result. The sentries on the battlements stayed as far away from the entrance since the smell obviously carried up to them.

Taking a lockpick from his pouch he moved closer under cover of darkness to the secluded doorway. It was unguarded and Iolaus felt for the lock carefully. Strictly by feeling alone he slid a thin piece of metal into the keyhole and began to wiggle it until it gave with a tiny click in the night.

"I've still got it." He thought to himself. Repressing the urge to cheer outloud, Iolaus was about to ease open the door when he remembered something. Feeling for the hinges he found his fingers come away covered in filth and grime.

"Rust." he thought to himself. The door would squeak horribly when he opened it. Turning to the dump, but not before a quick check on the sentries on the battlements, Iolaus picked his way through the refuse until he found a glob of grease suited to his purpose. Quickly he smeared the stuff liberally on the hinges, and then taking a deep breath opened the servants entrance a mere crack.

A banked fire threw dim shadows around the room that Iolaus assumed to be the kitchen. Opening the door a little more, he could see the sleeping figures of a kitchen boy and a scullery maid curled up next to the fire. Silently, Iolaus slid into the room and closed the door behind him, locking it again. Quickly he padded across the room, avoiding furniture, and nearly stepping on a dog's tail.

The mutt, surprisingly enough, did not bark but merely snuffed Iolaus' leg and laid it's head on it's paws.

"Not much of a guard dog, huh boy?" Iolaus whispered to the animal scratching it's ears for a moment before climbing the steps that lead to the upper levels.

Iolaus could make out only one set of guards on the upper level guarding a door on the left side of the corridor. Obviously this was were he would find the parchments and scrolls Hermes had told him about. The guards seemed fully awake despite the late hour, and flanking the doorway were two torches that lit up the area of the hall extremely well. 

Iolaus hugged the wall, crouching behind a statue and became as still as possible. His mind however was at running full speed, searching for some way he could gain entrance to the room. He supposed he could just go up and beat them senseless, but he would probably wake up the whole place. And if he didn't alert the entire garrison by bashing heads, they'd still have his description to pass on to the other warlords and to Ares.

"Note to self," he thought grimly as he scanned the corridor once again "get a disguise."

Suddenly his eyes caught the number of ornate weapons hung decoratively slightly farther down the corridor where the hall turned a corner. Eyes alight with possibilities, Iolaus reached for his sling he had woven around his belt. Anxiously he searched for a stone or a rock to throw, and found

a convenient one stuck to the heel of his boot. 

"Okay guys, time to be distracted." he thought to himself as he let the rock fly.

With a clank the rock hit the crossed swords on the wall. Predictably the guards whirled in that direction. 

"What was that? Who's there?" on of them called as he grabbed a torch and took a few steps down the corridor, weapon ready. His partner also drew his sword and followed behind, peering down the hall.

Iolaus swiftly snuck up behind them and slipped easily into the unguarded room, shutting the door only an instant before the guards turned their attention back to their post.

"Whew, that was close." Iolaus whispered to himself as he made his way in the dark as carefully as he could to the window he knew from his outside surveillance must be somewhere on the far wall. Opening the shutters just a crack to let a stream of starlight in, he took in the room. His eyes alighted on the table covered with a mess of parchment. Iolaus rushed over to and brought scroll after scroll into the light trying to find the right one, and then attempted to place them back in the exact "order" he'd

found them. Just as he was about to throw up his hands in defeat and take all of them, he found one covered not with tactical diagrams but with strange pictures of cogs and wheels. 

Squinting his eyes in the darkness, he decided this had to be it and tucked it securely into his belt pouch, only to hear movement from outside the room; the sound of echoing footsteps getting closer. Frantically, Iolaus looked for a place to hide. "Under the table? No, too exposed." he thought quickly. "Behind the wall hangings? Against a far wall? Where?" 

He glance up and saw the rafters from which the candle holders hung. Grinning, he pressed the shutters closed and adjusting his stance jumped up into the air, somersaulting once and coming to rest balanced on a sturdy rafter in the complete darkness. Suddenly the door sprang open, illuminating the room with torchlight. Carefully, Iolaus slunk back into the darken corners of the room and watched with keen interest. 

He did not know the warlord who entered by sight, obviously some minor soldier who had found favor in Ares' eyes, but there was an air of menace around him. The general also had some sort of craftsman with him, possibly a blacksmith judging by the smudges and stains on the apron he wore. The guards entered with the two men to Iolaus' luck, and he hopped rafters silently until he was just above the door. The warlord was even now shuffling through his scrolls and Iolaus had a pretty good idea which one

he was looking for. 

"My lord Ares wants the machine ready within the week Barnias." the warlord instructed the craftsman harshly. "You've had plenty of time to gather the equipment, so I want you to begin working on this right away." 

"Of course General Demothse." Barnias replied in a gravely voice as he wiped his hands on his apron.

"With this marvel I will be able to crush the pitiful army in Anoros and take the gold mines for myself and rule- wait. Where is it? Where is the scroll?!" Demothse flung parchment every which way in a desperate search for the scroll. "Where is the scroll?!"

"That's my cue to leave." Iolaus thought smugly as he dropped down silently to the floor and ducked out of the room.

Deciding to leave the place by a different means than he had entered Iolaus dashed up to the heights of the building and climbed on to the roof. Already he could hear the angry shouts from the general as guards rushed to obey his orders, milling around like so many ants and thus deserting their posts along the battlements. Taking the grappling hook into his hands and feeling the comforting weight in his grasp, Iolaus snapped the hook open and twirling it several times above his head to gain momentum, he released it down towards the battlements where it wound it's way around an iron torch holder. Grasping his sword in two hands above the rope he slid down to the walkway well above the chaos of the soldiers who were searching for the thief.

Bouncing twice in his landing and recoiling the hook, Iolaus found himself giggling. He'd forgotten how much fun it was to run circles around those he stole from. Shaking his head in pity at the obvious disorganization of men and the screams of the incessed general, Iolaus shot the grappling hook into a nearby tree and swung away, but not before giving into the irresistible impulse to give out the call he'd heard Autolycus use so many times before.

"Yodeleheehoooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

For the second afternoon in a row Hercules sat down at Cassandra's table for dinner. However this time, the brown-haired seer could tell the demigod was not paying the slightest attention to the food or her. She didn't need to ask what was worrying him, it was painfully obvious in the way he even now spend every spare moment glancing out the window of her cottage and down the road waiting for his friend to come.

But no matter how long Hercules stared at that road, he could not make his friend magically appear.

Finally, Hercules could keep quiet no longer. "I never should have let him go to Hermes' temple alone." he muttered guiltily to himself.

Cassandra halted her spoon midway to her mouth and sighed. "Hercules, I'm sure your friend Iolaus is fine. I've seen nothing bad happening besides the storm of destruction."

"But what if Iolaus is somehow caught up in whatever danger you see coming?" the demigod asked rising from the table and going over to stare out of the window yet again.

"I wish I could tell you more," Cassandra said in a small voice "But it just doesn't work that way!"

"There's not even a message. Iolaus would at least send a message if he was delayed." Hercules continued anxiously.

Pulling herself together Cassandra joined Hercules at the window placing a tentative hand on his gauntleted arm. "You said he was heading for Mysia?" she asked almost rhetorically. "Then in the morning, that's where we go." she informed him firmly. "And along the way we can look into finding Daedalus' notes and crystals. Mysia should be holding court tomorrow since tonight is the new moon. Maybe we'll find someone there who could tell us about the break-in."

Hercules finally tore his eyes away from the road and looked at Cassandra. After a moment he nodded sheepishly. She was right. Action was the answer to his worries, not brooding.

"Are you sure you want to come along Cassandra?" Hercules said as he took his seat and picked up his spoon once again.

"Oh yes." she insisted. "I do not want anyone to have those inventions. I've seen the price of progress." she said bitterly. "Plus," the seer put in with a smile now "I want to meet this friend of yours. From the way you've been acting this past day, he must be some friend for you to get so worried for him."

Hercules chuckled. "You know if he knew how worried I was for him he'd probably call me a mother hen and then tell me that he's a grown man and can take care of himself just fine without my help."

Iolaus packed his purple vest away carefully and quickly slipped on the black long sleeved tunic that was untied at the collar. Running his fingers through his hair to straighten and soften it somewhat, Iolaus then

reached down and tucked his amulet beneath his shirt. He'd already replaced his leather pants for a softer pair of brown breeches. He'd kept his boots however, they were more that useful for sneaking around. He hesitated to take off his sword, but he did tuck away his hunting knife in his boot. Then grabbing the forest green cloak and slinging it over his right shoulder and whistling jauntily Iolaus headed for Anoros, his next target.

"Well?" Cassandra waited urgently for Hercules to tell her if he'd found anything as she shouldered her pack.

Hercules shrugged noncommittally, annoyance and worry etched on his face.

"No news, huh?" she assumed sympathetically.

"No one saw Iolaus! I asked at the taverns and the inns, I even checked the temple!" Hercules replied angrily as he began pacing back and forth. "It's like he vanished off the face of the earth. No one even saw him enter town!" The demigod sighed and rubbed his face tiredly with his hands before falling heavily onto a bench in front of one of the numerous inns in Mysia. "Have you seen anything Cassandra?" he asked in a low voice laced with desperation.

She shook her head, unable to offer him anything in the way of news, good or bad. "I can see nothing about your friend. But," she continued on in a hopeful voice. "I did hear that a fortress in Dieria had some trouble last night."

Hercules looked up suddenly. "What do you mean?" he asked carefully.

"While you were out looking the innkeeper threw out a rather drunk out-of-work soldier. He was ranting about some mysterious parchment that was stolen from a warlord's fortress in Dieria. He seemed very upset about it," Cassandra continued smugly, seeing the growing interest in the demigod's eyes "since he lost his post at the garrison because of it."

"That fits what we thought about Daedalus' stolen papers." Hercules said with more energy. "Ares must have handed them out to various warlords and generals, maybe even opposing sides."

"But why would someone steal the already stolen scrolls?" Cassandra asked puzzled. "If Ares or this Discord you mentioned took the plans and gave them to some warmongers in the first place, who is stealing them now?"

Hercules clenched his jaw in thought, eyes half closed. "Maybe," he began slowly after a long moment. "maybe whoever the gods got to steal the invention plans in the first place is having second thoughts about the situation and wants them back."

Cassandra blinked trying to follow the rather strange reasoning behind the demigod's statement. "Who would be stupid enough to do that?"

"Eat up your majesty! You have five minutes. Don't want him to be late for his own execution!"

"Wonderful!" Autolycus groused. "No trial, no lengthy stay in fine, cramped, dark, accommodations. They just grab you, beat you, and then kill you!" Pushing aside his food, the King of Thieves grasped the bars and yelled at the retreating guard "I'm telling you, I've been set up!"

His only reply was the slamming of a door cutting off harsh laughter.

Letting go of the grimy bars, Autolycus dusted himself off fastidiously. "Now that my winning performance it done," he said grandly addressing the obviously drunk man in the next cell, "The King of Thieves will now make his daring escape without . . . the use of lockpicks." he finished with a depressed mutter as he instinctively reached for his now missing tools. 

"Never mind." Autolycus put in to his unconscious neighbor overconfidently. "I'll just rescue myself with my own two hands. I have a plan you see, because I am the King of Thieves. No cell can hold me. No lock is too difficult for me to undo. No fortress impregnable."

Looking around once again at his surroundings, Autolycus let out a moan of despair as he fell onto the filthy pallet and put his master plan in action.

"HELP! CAN ANYONE HEAR ME!?! **HEEEEELLLLPPPPP!**"

"Autolycus, will you shut-up and get moving? We don't have time for your whining!" a firm voice ordered from above him.

The thief looked up at the small chink high above him where his sole stream of sunlight cut through the darkness of the prison. "My prayers have been answered! Hercules? Is that you?" he asked eagerly.

"Yes it's me." a reluctant voice answered back as a rope snaked its way down to the imprisoned man. "Now grab the rope. You've got some serious explaining to do."

"Me?!" Autolycus retorted, annoyance lacing his words as he started pulling himself up. "I'm innocent! I'm the victim of an unjust system that threw me in jail to rot without telling me what I'd done to deserve such cruel treatment!"

"Sure you are." Hercules replied, voice dripping with sarcasm as he reached down through the hole, took hold of Autolycus' arm and literally yanked him through the weak masonry of the ceiling.

"OWWWWWW! That hurt!"

"You asked for help." Hercules countered, raising his hands in innocence and thus dropping the dusty thief onto the ground behind the town hall.

"Well you could have thought up a more original, less basic plan of escape. Something with a little more finesse." Autolycus said as he rose to his feet and was about to brush his mustache when he noticed how filthy his hands were. "I need a bath." he remarked to himself.

"Yes you do." Hercules agreed, grabbing the kleptomaniac by the scruff of the neck and dragging him out of town.

"Hey! What's this about? Where are we going?"

"You'll see." Hercules prophesied darkly as he tromped into the woods.

Iolaus made a mad dash for the window even as guards burst into the war room yelling and carrying on like a bunch of loons. Grinning madly he dove through the glass head first landing with a somersault on the parade ground in the midst of training soldiers who stopped mid-drill to stare at the intruder puzzledly.

Iolaus drew himself up regally and announced "Carry on! I want to see you sweat! This isn't dancing, this is war! I want to see some fighting! Now move, move, move!"

A chorus of "yes sir's!" rang loudly through the courtyard as the soldiers took up arms against each other with a newfound ferocity.

"Huh!" Iolaus smiled in surprise as he began to walk calmly towards the open gate. As he went he gave into the mischievous impulse to review the troops. Adopting a stern expression, clasping his hands firmly behind his back, Iolaus began to call out to the combatants as he went. "You! Raise that left arm! Defend yourself you moron! Hey, Stupid! Don't grip a sword like it's a toy! It's a weapon for Zeus' sake! Sloppy work, you sissies! I know green cadets who could do better!"

"STOP THIEF!"

The training men-at-arms looked up from their practice to see who the frantic guards were pointing at.

Iolaus, realizing he was now the center of a decidedly different sort of attention, giggled nervously and turned to the nearest solider. "You know," he remarked conversationally. "I hate those words."

"Don't just stand there! The general will have our heads! KILL HIM!!"

"And we were getting along so well!" Iolaus said with a sigh. "Time to leave."

Iolaus broke into a run, even as the enraged troops stumbled after him in shock. The men training on horseback outside of the barracks galloped into the parade ground cutting off his exit.

"CLOSE THE GATE! **CLOSE THE GATE**!" the incessed lieutenant roared above the bedlam. The guards rushed to push the heavy doors closed.

But Iolaus wasn't planning to go through the gate. With a jerk of his wrist he brought his grappling hook into his hand and launched it at the keystone of the arch above the exit. With a satisfying clank it secured and Iolaus went flying up and over and most importantly out, of harms way just as the gates closed with a resounding finality.

"OPEN THE GATE!** OPEN THE GATE**!"

Landing with a thump outside the secluded barracks of yet another one of Ares' warlords, Iolaus laughed at the sport of it all, and took a moment to shake some stray shards of glass out of his hair before he began to leisurely walk away even as the sounds of chaos continued behind him.

As he tucked the fourth scroll into his belt he chuckled to himself. "I guess I just wasn't cut out for the army after all."

"Look, Autolycus, we've spent the last two weeks tracking you down, when I should be out looking for Iolaus, so stop fooling around and tell me where you're hiding Daedalus' scrolls." Hercules growled shaking the thief firmly.

"F-f-f-o-o-r-r-r t-h-e-e-e l-a-a-a-s-t t-i-i-i-i-m-e-e, I-i-i-i d-o-o-o-n-'t-t-t h-a-a-v-e-e t-h-e-e-m-m!" Autolycus replied as his head snapped back and forth.

"But you did steal them in the first place, didn't you? Didn't you?!"

"Hercules calm down! You're shaking him too hard." Cassandra ordered trying to stop the demigod from damaging Autolycus any further. "Give him a chance to speak."

Hercules let go of him suddenly and Autolycus lost his balance and nearly fell into the campfire. "For Zeus' sake, big guy I don't know what you're talking about! I don't know any Daedalus! I haven't stolen anything from him or from any warlords of Ares. I don't work for gods. I've had more than my fill of them of late!"

"You're saying that you had nothing to do with the missing invention plans or the recent rumors of break-ins at the fortress in Dieria, the mining camp in Anoros, and the garrison in Phocaea?" Cassandra questioned as she resumed her seat on a fallen log.

"I swear on my grandmother's grave that I had nothing to do with stealing inventions from crackpot scientists or from crazed warlords!" Autolycus yelled at the demigod and the woman. "How stupid do you think I am?! I'm a thief, not a murderer!"

"What about the descriptions I heard about in Anoros?" Hercules countered crossing his arms, trying not to be shaken by Autolycus' genuine anger. "They said a man in green snuck in and stole everything and escaped only after he wreaked havoc on their camp. And in Dieria the stories were of a man swinging over the fortress walls giving out a very familiar call. And just today, you were in a cell in Phocaea, the most recent place robbed."

"Look, Hercules, do I have my grappling hook? Or my lockpicks for that matter?" Autolycus asked bitterly. "You are not the only one who's had a hard time of it recently! I've been having one trouble after the next." he announced as he began to pace worriedly about. "One botched heist after another, missing equipment, more arrests in one week than in a year. And then I've been constantly jumped by bounty hunters that usually couldn't find me if I was standing right in front of them! My arrest in Phocaea? I barely stepped foot in the town and I was dragged of to jail! I didn't even get a *chance* to steal anything! They just grabbed me!" 

Hercules looked at Cassandra who after a long moment had to admit "I believe him Hercules. All my instincts tell me that he's telling us the truth."

"There, see?" Autolycus said slapping his leg with vindication. "Listen to the lady Hercules, she knows what she's talking about." 

Hercules regarded the thief for a long moment and had to agree with Cassandra's assessment, but something still puzzled him about Autolycus' words, they sounded familiar, but he couldn't place it. Pushing the nagging feeling aside he joined Cassandra on the log. "Well it looks like we're back to square one." he remarked bitterly.

After a moment Autolycus calmed down and sat on the ground, back against a comfortable tree. He'd never seen the demigod so angry, he always seemed so patient and controlled. It was usually his friend who had the quick temper. "So where is Iolaus?" he asked after a moment, noticing the hunter's conspicuous absence.

"He's missing." Hercules replied softly. "We separated at the Mysia crossroads almost three weeks ago, he was supposed to meet me in Calydon after two days. He never showed up."

Autolycus digested this news carefully. He'd never seen the demigod so angry and so despondent. He'd always kid to Iolaus how Hercules only kept him around as a joke, but in truth, even a blind man could see both men were inseparable. Noticing the need to change the subject, he brought the topic of conversation back to the matter at hand "Do you have any idea who could be behind the original theft or why someone would steal them back?"

"We're not even sure it is the same person who took the plans from Daedalus who's stealing them from the warlords now." Cassandra explained. 

"But you thought it was me." It was a statement, not a question, and a slightly angry one at that.

"We thought you'd decided or been forced to steal them for Ares and then had an attack of conscious and were trying to get them back." Hercules admitted ruefully. "You were the only one who could have taken it from Daedalus' workshop. He's been very careful about security."

"Well I'm glad you at least have some appreciation for my unparalleled skill." Autolycus remarked as he brushed his mustache with a flourish.

"In case you haven't noticed," Cassandra pointed out "If you didn't do it, and you're not robbing generals, that means you're no longer unparalleled."

"You said the gods were involved, so they probably stole from this Daedalus guy. It just goes to show you that only an immortal could outfox me."

"What about the thief who's stealing the plans back?" Hercules asked smugly. "Sounds to me as if you're being replaced."

"I'm the King of Thieves!" Autolycus sputtered indignantly. 

Hercules favored the thief with a wan smile "Not anymore." 

Iolaus broke camp late the next morning. He'd decided to let himself have the luxury of sleeping in recently since he'd been avoiding villages. He already had a criminal record, no need to add to it by getting back at Ares. Besides, who needs to be boastful like Autolycus to gain a reputation? Even when he didn't go into towns, he still heard the rumors when he went after his targets; rumors and stories about a new thief, and he had to admit it was all very flattering given the circumstances.

As he kicked out his fire, Iolaus turned to more serious thoughts. It was becoming more and more difficult to break into each subsequent stronghold, taking more and more time to reach the targets.

Ares must have all his men on alert as a result of his recent activities. Iolaus had to chuckle as his mind produced a vivid picture of the god of war throwing one tantrum after another as he lost his newfound

technological advantage. He hoped that Discord was getting the brunt of it all.

According to what Iolaus had been able to piece together from the strange parchments he'd "acquired" there was still one more piece of paper out there and possibly some of those strange glowing rocks that were mentioned several times as well. One, maybe two more heists, and his month was up. But he knew Ares was not going to make this easy.

Pushing aside his morbid thoughts, Iolaus hit the road towards Mytilene deciding to enjoy the day and not worry so much. After all he was the King of Thieves, if he couldn't do it, no one could.

Hercules, Autolycus, and Cassandra also had a slow start but not because they chose to.

Hercules rose with the sun, satisfied that the thief had kept his word and was still with them. He quickly stirred up the fire and noticing their low supply of fresh food, went foraging for breakfast.

By the time the demigod returned he found a frantic Autolycus trying desperately to way up an obviously entranced Cassandra. Dropping the fruit he'd found without a backwards glance, Hercules fell to his knees and pushed the thief aside.

"Don't wake her! She's having a dream."

"I noticed! And it looks like a bad one, I was only trying to help." Autolycus said defensively from where he lay sprawled on his back from the demigod's push.

"No, not that kind of dream," Hercules explained quickly casting Autolycus an apologetic glance while stroking Cassandra's hair as she moved restlessly on her bedroll. "She receives prophecy and visions of the future."

"The future?" Autolycus repeated in surprise, and though Hercules was not watching him, the demigod knew that the kleptomaniac's's mind was already awhirl with all the possibilities and opportunities Cassandra's gift could grant him.

"Don't even think about it." Hercules ordered with a grin, a note of reproach in his words.

"What? Think about what?" 

"Never mind." Hercules muttered with exasperation. His attention shifted back to Cassandra who stiffened suddenly and then woke with a gasp. 

"Hercules!" she cried out trying to rise.

"I'm here." he soothed, pressing her back down. "It's all right, I'm here."

"I-I saw the thief, and an explosion, it was like Atlantis all over again!"

"Atlantis? The mythical island? Are you sure she sees the future?" Autolycus asked warily from behind Hercules.

"Yes she does."

"Hercules, we have to go, now." Cassandra pleaded sitting up dizzily.

"Take it easy." Hercules scolded gently as he helped her prop herself up against the log. "Where do we have to go Cassandra?"

"Mytilene."

Iolaus took in the fair sized city in one glance. Here he could loose himself until night fell. He supposed he could go in and get the parchment now, but as he approached the palace he knew it was not going to

be easy. Obviously a patron of Ares, the king had guards posted everywhere, all entrances secure.

Making his way to the lower quarters of the city, Iolaus entered the most non-descript inn he could. The proprietor, a delicate old woman with silver hair manned the place with a steely determination bellying her size.

She looked up as Iolaus entered and he flashed her a grin. 

"Yes?" she demanded angrily.

Not to be put off by her prickly demeanor Iolaus asked "I was wondering if I might trouble you for a room ma'am."

The old woman flustered slightly, obviously not expecting such courtesy. "O-of course young man." she said as she rose to lead the way. "How long will you be staying?" she asked as they made their way up the stairs. 

"The night." Iolaus replied politely as he took her arm in his. "I'd like to pay in advance if you don't mind, I might have to leave before morning."

"That's perfectly fine young man." she assured him patting his arm gratefully as she opened a door before them. "Is there anything I can get you?"

"A bath would be most appreciated." Iolaus said courtly as he kissed her hand. "And if you could, some privacy for the rest of my stay."

The old lady laughed at his manners and swatted him lightly on the shoulder. "Now none of that young man! I may be old, but I know a charmer when I see one. I'll make sure no one bother's you, and I'll send an early supper up for you personally."

"Thank you." Iolaus said with a giggle as he shut the door.

Perhaps it was a risk, making himself memorable to any one person, but then he hadn't slept in a bed in weeks and he looked forward to a warm bath in view of icy mountain streams. Besides, Iolaus thought to himself as he flopped down on the bed with a sigh, didn't he have a reputation to maintain? 

It was near dusk when they finally made it to Mytilene. Autolycus had had several mishaps along the way with a crazed rabbit and a run-away chariot that confirmed his story of a run of bad luck. Hercules had set a grueling pace since Cassandra felt relatively sure they could find the thief staying there if they hurried.

"Why do you want to catch the guy so badly?" Autolycus all but panted as they crossed the footbridge over the stream into the city. "I mean, isn't he doing you a favor by stealing the scrolls away from Ares?"

"Even if he is helping us, we still don't know why or who. And I don't feel safe with Daedalus' knowledge or crystals in the hands of some thief." Hercules explained.

"Oh so you wouldn't trust me with them would ya? Is that what you're saying? That thieves have no honor?" Autolycus demanded more than a little miffed.

"Look what you do for a living." Hercules responded vaguely, more intent on finding a quick way into the palace to see the king. "It hardly instills a great confidence in me."

Taking a left through the market place, Hercules halted suddenly blocking the way forward. 

"Hey, what's the hold up?" Autolycus complained.

"What is it Hercules? Aren't you going to go and talk to the king about the thief?" Cassandra asked puzzled.

"I . . . think he already knows Cassandra." Hercules said slowly, body tensing.

"Well then this should be easy. Go in, get the guy who has the gaul to pretend to be me, and then leave." Autolycus remarked flippantly rubbing his hands together with pleasure. "Let's go talk to the king." 

"I don't think he'll listen." Hercules countered a humorless laugh escaping from his lips.

"What are you talking about? What could possibly be-" The thief pushed his way forward and past Hercules to see what the problem was, Cassandra right behind him.

What they saw stopped them short as well.

"Oh." Autolycus finished, eyebrows rising.

Before them in all his supposed glory was a statue of Ares himself, god of war.

"The king is not going to be much help is he?" Cassandra asked knowingly.

Hercules took one more look at the giant image of his half brother before turning away in disgust. "No, he's not."

"Hey! Ugly!"

"What?" roared the sentry, wheeling around to catch whoever had insulted him but seeing no one in the early evening light. Suddenly he felt a tap on his shoulder and he spun around again "Who in *&%$ Tartarus-?" 

"Tut tut! Such language!" Iolaus scolded before solidly connecting his fist to the guards' face.

Grabbing the helmet in his free hand and donning it quickly as he saw the other pacing sentry approached he bent over and began slapping the guard lightly to wake him up.

"Hey! What's going on there?"

"Drunk on duty! It's disgraceful! And he calls himself a soldier." Iolaus scoffed looking up from his unconscious charge to the other man. 

"Who in Hades are you?" the guard demanded drawing his sword as he realized that Iolaus was only wearing the helmet of a soldier.

"Does it *really* matter?" the blond replied with a charming grin before lashing out his foot to trip the man and then knock his lights out as well. 

Sighing loudly to himself, Iolaus began to arrange the bodies carefully a little way off from the stables adjacent to the palace that the two men had been guarding. 

"Now what have you two gotten yourselves into, hmm?" he murmured to himself as he took a flask from his pocket and spilled some wine on both men and then placed the flask in one of the man's hand. "Fighting over wine while on duty? A dismissible offense if you're lucky." Iolaus took off the helmet and unceremoniously dropped it on the groaning and twitching guard's head. "Time for a new career boys. Sweet dreams." 

Entering the stables and breathing in the smell of horses and leather Iolaus made his way through the stalls until he found what he was looking for. A large hole in the ceiling that instead of showing the sky full of stars, was black and smelled of grain. Reaching up, Iolaus felt the edges of the hole and realized he was right, it was a grain chute that with any luck would lead right into the palace. Rather ingenious really. Taking off cloak and hiding it along with his carrysack under a bale of straw, Iolaus pulled himself up through the chute.

They got a single room at a nearby inn. The tiny silver haired lady manning it was just bringing down an empty tray with dirty dishes on it when they entered. Distractedly humming, she motioned them up the stairs.

"I've just had a room vacated, go on up and make yourselves at home." she said to them with a smile.

"What are we going to do?" Cassandra moaned sitting on the bed, head in her hands. "This king is obviously a supporter of Ares, if we tell him about the thief he'll just lock Daedalus' inventions up tighter than before!"

"And if we don't tell him, whoever the thief is, whatever his, or her plans are will have Daedalus' weapons." Hercules finished for her slapping his leg in exasperation as he entered the surprisingly clean room. Autolycus followed nearly slipping on a barely mopped up puddle of water on the floor.

"Hercules, the dark storm I saw in my vision . . ." Cassandra began anxiously. "It's changed, it's calmed, well sort of." she amended "But I still see this explosion and someone falling . . . falling into darkness."

She raised her eyes to meet the demigod's blue ones. "I don't know what it means."

"Look," Hercules knelt down and gently took her shaking hands in his. "We are going to figure this out. There is not going to be another Atlantis. I promise you." 

Autolycus, who had been peeking out of the window, turned to glance back at his two companions. "I hate to break this up, but we do have another option."

"That being?" Hercules asked expectantly.

"I break in to the palace and steal the plans before our mystery thief gets there."

"Can he really do that?" Cassandra wondered out loud remembering all of Autolycus' mishaps through the day as she glanced at the demigod who now rose to his feet.

Autolycus looked wounded by the seers doubt, but then puffed out his chest in pride and brushed his mustache with the back of his hand. "My dear, you are looking at the King of Thieves. There isn't a place I can't get in or out of."

"I'm coming with you." Hercules insisted, clenching his hands into fists, ready for anything.

"No, no, no, no, no." The greenclad man shook his head rapidly. "Listen big guy, this is a job for professionals."

"This is a palace under Ares' protection." Hercules reminded him poking him lightly in the chest.

Autolycus rubbed the sore spot ruefully. "I know, I know. I've dealt with Ares before."

"Yeah, right." Hercules chuckled in exasperation. "You don't have lockpicks or a grappling hook and you're a walking disaster; you need me."

Autolycus looked around trying to avoid the steely blue gaze of the son of Zeus, but to no avail. "Oh all right, you can come. Just try to stay out of the way."

"Okay."

"Whatever you say!" Cassandra agreed jumping to her feet with nervous energy. "Let's go."

Hercules and Autolycus turned their attention to the seer and spoke as one.

"You're not coming!"

It was slow going. 

Yes, he'd been right about the grain chute leading directly into the palace and he'd managed to get though the tight fit only getting stuck once, but now it was made abundantly clear to Iolaus that it was going to be next to impossible to get the last scroll without being detected. The palace was crawling with soldiers even at this late hour. There were guards at every major door, sentries at the larger windows, even patrols of foot soldiers going up and down the corridors. It was obvious Ares had warned the king of Mytilene about the recent theft of the other parchments and the king had taken measures to prevent any such theft here. 

"Maybe it's time for the direct approach." the golden thief whispered to himself from behind a tapestry. As he slid along, back to the wall, face against the cloth, he prayed to whoever might be listening that no one noticed him.

Iolaus had no idea where the parchment could be kept. Given the state of security around the palace, the king might as well be sleeping with it under his pillow.

"Well I'll just have to squeeze the information out of someone." Iolaus muttered to himself as he ducked behind a large decorative vase. 

"Are you sure this is the best way in?" Cassandra asked in a loud whisper from her perch atop Hercules' broad shoulders?

"Shhhh!" Autolycus hissed as he fiddled with the window latch. "The guards will be back here any minute!"

With a click the window opened and Autolycus dispensed with his spider imitation and slithered into the room silently. Seeing the sentries down the corridor turning and preparing to pace back, he ducked behind one of the shutters and held his breath.

"What's the hold up?" Hercules asked the seer standing on his shoulders. "Soldiers." she told him and Hercules quickly took a step closer to the palace walls in an attempt to hide in the shadows.

Cassandra stifled a yelp of surprise at the sudden movement, nearly losing her balance. Hercules quickly tightened his grip on her ankles and held his breath.

The guards walked past.

Letting out a collective sigh of relief, Autolycus reached out and grabbed Cassandra's wrists and pulled her through the window. Hercules now free of his burden turned and began scaling the palace walls, wedging his fingers into the cracks in the masonry through sheer force of will.

Once they were all inside Cassandra, bouncing on her feet, whispered "Where to now?"

Autolycus stroked his mustache thoughtfully. "I'm not sure, usually I scout a place before I take a flying leap into it. Especially when said place is swarming with soldiers."

"We don't have time for this!" Hercules warned in a low voice, checking the corridors with a cursory glance. "Let's just find the scroll and get out." 

"Well where do you suggest we look?" Autolycus asked indignantly. "With this security, it could be anywhere, maybe even on the kings own person!"

"Well I suggest we find a passing guard and get him to enlighten us." Hercules retorted.

"Fine! Be tactless and brutal about this! See if I care!" the thief announced throwing up his hands in disgust. "You ask for my help, to suffer for my art, and now you want to pound information out of people;

that's just great!" 

Hercules sighed noisily, narrowing his eyes. "Oh all right, we'll do it your way!"

"If you two are done," Cassandra put in imperiously, hands on her hips "I think we better get out of the way, because here comes an officer." 

Quickly they scrambled for hiding places. The officer staggered down the hallway croaking and rubbing his head. Hercules glared at Autolycus, tensing, wanting nothing more than burst from his hiding place and demand the officer tell him where the scroll was.

The officer was nearly past them when Autolycus snuck up behind the man and grabbed him in a headlock. "All right you pathetic excuse for a warrior, where does the king keep his scrolls?" the thief demanded in a low threatening voice.

Hercules stood up indignantly. "I thought you said my way was tactless and brutal." 

"I'm being tactful!"

"Will you guys shut-up and get the information before the alarm is sounded and we're up to our eyeballs in soldiers!?" Cassandra scolded as she too stepped out from hiding.

Looking properly chastised both men back turned to the matter at hand. "So? Are you going to answer me or not?" the thief pressed, tightening his hold ever so slightly.

"Like. . . like I told . . . the other guy--" the man gasped "the king . . . keeps his valuables . . . in his . .. bed-- chamber."

"Other guy?" Autolycus repeated with a blink as his grip slacked.

It was all the opportunity the officer needed. He rammed his elbow into the thief's midsection and started croaking at the top of his lungs for his men.

"Just great." Hercules muttered as he knocked the officer out cold. The soldier went flying back and hit a gasping Autolycus who slammed into a vase which tumbled to the floor with a crash. "Oops."

Already in the distance they could hear the pound steps of approaching guards.

Cassandra looked at both men, lips pursed in righteous fury. "We're dead."

Iolaus was just about to duck out of the kings bedchamber when he heard the commotion outside. The king woke with a start, cutting off midsnore.

"Wha-what? What's going on?"

"Thief! Thief! Intruders! Intruders!" the call answered his majesty from beyond the door.

"Ares was right!" he roared, jumping out of bed clad in a royal puce colored robe, and grabbing his sword and his crown. The king threw open the door and charged into battle with his soldiers.

Iolaus stuck his head out from behind one of the convenient wall hangings that he was sure the palace decorators had put there because they all must have secretly been thieves themselves and grinned at the echoing battle cries of the king. "No wonder Ares gave this to you," he said with a laugh, tucking the prize in his belt. "You need all the help you can get!"

"Oh Great Zeus, this is the worst, the absolute worst heist ever!" Autolycus moaned as he dashed around a corner nearly tripping on the carpet and stumbling into Cassandra.

"Stop moaning and run!" Cassandra ordered sternly as she yanked him along.

"How long do you think Hercules will be able to hold them?" the thief asked the seer anxiously. "Can you tell? Are we going to die?"

"Autolycus, my power doesn't work that way! I can't just call up visions on a whim, and they don't always make sense either! And this is Hercules we're talking about! He'll be fine!" She skidded to a halt next to

Autolycus who was trying to figure out which way to go. "Hurry up!" she urged "Pick a direction and let's go!"

"Shouldn't we get the scroll?" Autolycus asked.

"Hercules said to forget about the scroll!" Cassandra counted tugging at his arm.

"Yeah but-"

"Autolycus!" she yelled grabbing him by the tunic until they were nose to nose. "This isn't the time to run off and prove to yourself who's the better thief! The scroll is already gone by now! Now let's get out of

here!"

Dodging frantic patrols of troops Iolaus had to wonder what idiot had tripped off such a colossal mess. Whoever it was had absolutely no idea how to be a good thief he mused. Humming unconcernedly Iolaus searched for a place to wait out the madness and then quietly slip away.

Hercules threw one solider at a half a dozen others who promptly fell over. He had to admit that the quality of Ares' servants had gone down in recent months, but then why should he complain? It just made it easier to kick their butts.

Grinning, Hercules took off in the opposite direction of Cassandra and Autolycus, hoping to lead the guards away from them long enough to let them escape back to the inn.

Behind him he could hear the slamming of doors and what sounded like a harpy, screeching at the top of its lungs for the men at arms to attack.

Like a thundering heard of elephants the soldiers dashed down the hall. Hercules tried a door and found it unlocked and quickly stepped inside--

--and ran straight into someone in the darkness.

Iolaus jumped about three feet, heart pounding in his chest like it wanted to jump straight out. Quickly ducking and backing away he wondered how he was going to get out of this mess.

Hercules stepped back until his shoulders touched the door and wondered if he'd imagined running into someone, when suddenly a foot connected with his side with vicious intent.

Grunting in pain, Hercules moved aside clumsily in the darkness. Whoever his attacker was, he'd bet Mt. Olympus it was the thief. 

Straining his eyes to catch any sort of movement in the blackness of the room, Iolaus listened intently, stilling his breath, trying to find this would-be-thief who'd been stupid enough to rouse the alarm of the whole palace.

Hercules waited too, waiting for the thief to make his first move.

They might have waited in darkness forever if not the sound of outside patrols spurred both men into desperate action.

Iolaus bolted for the servants passage he'd used to enter the room, his only goal escape while Hercules lunged for the thief wanting answers and Daedauls' work.

*_Damn, he's faster than Hermes_.* Hercules thought, barely catching hold of the thief

They wrestled each other in the darkness, throwing wild punches and ducking as best they could.

In frustration, Iolaus cursed under his breath and lashed out with his foot to knock his adversary down.

Instinctively Hercules raised his arm to block the blow, twisting around to unbalance the thief.

Iolaus, feeling the shift in direction and weight grinned smugly in the darkness and followed through, turning a complete circle in the opposite direction and lashing out with his other foot.

Hercules was more than a little stunned by the unexpected lightning blow and tripped against a chair or table leg just behind him, lost his balance and began to fall back.

*_Oh no you don't_!* Hercules reached out and grabbed for something to halt his fall. His fingers caught on the thief's shirt laces and then on a leather cord around the man's neck. Holding on tight, Hercules rolled as he hit the furniture and then the floor, dragging the thief with him with one pull.

The cord snapped under the strain and Hercules swore he heard the thief cry out as he lost whatever it was that had hung around his neck. The man tried to rise, untangling himself from Hercules. the carpet, and a table, but the demigod was too quick. Giving the thief a quick shove, the man fell down again next to the demigod and before he could move, Hercules had jumped him, pinning against the ground.

The thief's heart was pounding, Hercules could feel that under his arm which held the struggling man firmly. With his other hand he felt along the leather cord, hoping that maybe he'd find a scroll of Daedalus' attached to it. Instead, his hand encountered smooth stone, warmed by the thief's body heat. The shape was uncannily familiar, Hercules thought, almost like--

The door behind him swung open, light from outside piercing the blackness of the room, and thief and hero saw each other for the first time.

Blue eyes met blue as both men stared at each other in the dim light, recognition instant.

Hercules' eyes widened, and his jaw dropped in shock.

"Iolaus?" he gasped.

"Hercules! Look OUT!" Iolaus tried to push the demigod aside but was only mildly successful. With a thunk, what was to be a cleaving blow grazed Hercules in the head.

Scrambling and furious now, Iolaus reached for his dagger and threw it at the swordsman who even now was preparing to finish the job. 

Speeded and strengthened by adrenaline, Iolaus finally pushed the unconscious demigod off of him so that he could defend them both properly. He was glad now that he'd brought his sword despite it's awkwardness when thieving, these men were out for blood.

However there were no match for the enraged thief. Quickly dispatching the other three guards and slamming the door, plunging the room back into semi darkness Iolaus fumbled for the torch and shifted some heavy furniture into position to block the entrance from further intruders. He then turned his

attention back to his partner, dropping to his knees beside him. 

"Hercules? Can you hear me buddy?" Gingerly in the torchlight he examined the gash on the left side of the demigod's head. Blood already matted the bronze hair, but Hercules' breathing was good and he twitched and moaned a little when Iolaus touched the wound lightly.

"You're gonna be all right." he assure his friend in a low voice as he felt along Hercules' ribs to see if he'd broken any. Luckily they seemed just bruised.

"Chalk one up to divine blood." Iolaus murmured with a faint smile.

Grabbing his amulet and cleaning his knife, tucking both away, Iolaus wasted no time in lifting his friend to his feet, supporting him across his own back.

Fueled with anger Iolaus ignored the strain on his muscles the impressive bulk of the demigod caused and ducked back through the servants entrance and down a flight of shallow stone steps.

"Ya know Herc, this is gonna make one Hades' of a tale." Iolaus wheezed as in all the confusion of the palace he slipped right past a frantic score of soldiers and out the kitchen store room door. "You and me fighting each other in the dark! Jason's gonna laugh himself silly over this one!" Iolaus went inside the stables long enough to grab his stuff and then he was off again.

As quickly as he could, the golden thief slipped through the alleys back towards the inn he'd stayed in earlier that night. Hopefully if he slipped the old woman a coin or two she'd take care of Herc and he could dash off and finish Hermes' jobs and be back by the time his best friend was well again.

About halfway to his destination, Iolaus let out a gasp and staggered towards an abandoned market stall where he propped the demigod against the wooden frame. "Gotta rest a moment Herc." he explained, almost doubling over as he caught his breath. "You weigh a ton buddy." After a moment Iolaus let out a low chuckle. "Well this is what it comes down to, huh? I miss you so much I hold conversations with you when you're out cold!"

Plopping down next to his unconscious friend, Iolaus ran his fingers through his hair sighing deeply. "I wonder what you've been doing without me." he murmured softly. "Probably avoided a whole bunch of useless brawls." he answered himself with a giggle. "Ah well, month's almost up and then I'll be there to drive you crazy with my singing again. At least you'll eat better with me hunting." Iolaus reasoned with a devilish grin slapping his knees as he rose to his feet once more. "Come on Herc, let's get you someplace warm." Wrapping his green cloak around his friend, he hoisted him on his shoulder again with a groan.

Iolaus eased the demigod down onto the bed as gently as he could as the silver haired proprietoress gathered a needle and cloth and a basin of warm water.

"You'll take good care of him while I'm gone Rowan?" Iolaus asked again.

"Of course son." the woman soothed, patting him on the arm motheringly. "Your brother will be just fine."

Iolaus smiled shyly at Rowan's inferred kinship between them, pleased that a stranger could tell what he felt in his heart.

Leaning over the bed, Iolaus tucked his green cloak tighter around the still form, brushing the golden brown hair away from the demigod's closed eyes. "You rest and get better so we can go fishing when I get back. No having all the fun without me." Iolaus ordered with a grin.

Hercules stirred under his friend's touch, eyelids flickering. Iolaus pulled back quickly. The longer he stayed the harder it would be to leave, and he had to finish this mess soon. The crystals were close according to the notes the king of Mytilene had made on his part of the parchments. He had to hurry. Ares was even now warning his men of his eminent arrival, he was sure of it. With a stab of regret and pain in his heart, he turned towards Rowan again.

"I'll be in Partheon. If something goes wrong . . ." he trailed off, voice breaking slightly at the thought.

"I'll send a message." she assured him with a nod as she began bathing the head wound.

"But don't tell him where I am. He'll probably jump out of bed and try and follow." he warned her with a glint of fond amusement in his eye as he tied his amulet around his neck. "He's an awful patient." he commented trying to hand Rowan a few more dinars, but she wouldn't hear of it.

Shoving him gently out of the door she shooed him away. "Now go on young man. Get out of here before you stop listening to your head and decide to stay and pester me for days on end. I'll take care of him. You be careful."

"Thanks." Iolaus said nodding his head in appreciation.

Rowan turned to got back in the room when the door across the dark hall opened and a dark haired woman stuck her head out cautiously. 

"Hercules? Is that you?" she whispered but then caught sight of the proprietoress. "Oh, I'm sorry." she apologized. "I thought you were someone else. You wouldn't have seen a tall muscular man come in wearing a yellow shirt and leather breeches with light brown hair?" Cassandra asked nervously. 

Rowan gauged the other woman carefully before telling her anything. Satisfied that she posed no threat she gestured behind her. "I've got him in here."

"Really?" Cassandra perked up immediately, she then turned and spoke to someone behind her. "He's back, he's in the room across from ours."

Autolycus' grumblings could be heard even at a distance. "Got himself his own room, huh? Didn't even bother to mention he's back." the greenclad thief opened the door and followed Cassandra and the old woman into the other room. "I risk my neck for him, go against my courageous character and he- he . . ." Autolycus trailed off into subdued silence at the sight of the demigod, pale and still on the bed.

"What happened?" Cassandra asked coming over to the side of the bed where Rowan finished tending to his head wound and began bandaging his torso.

"I don't know." Rowan retorted sharply, obviously not approving of the nervous fluttery type. Cassandra immediately stilled and got a hold of herself. Nodding her approval Rowan motioned for the seer to help her lift Hercules into a sitting position as she bound his ribs tightly. "They're only bruised, but he had a nasty knock to the head." 

"It's a wonder he made it here at all." Autolycus said frankly as he paced worriedly back and forth like an expectant father.

"If not for his brother who know what might have happened." Rowan agreed sagely as she lay Hercules back onto the featherbed. 

"Excuse me? His *brother*?" Autolycus interjected as he whirled around from his pacing to face the woman. "Are you telling me that Ares or-or-or Apollo brought him here? Lady, are you crazy?"

Hands on her hips, the old woman matched the kleptomaniacs glare with a steely one of her own. "The name is Mistress Rowan to you, you ill-mannered clap-jawed ruffian, and what are you babbling about?"

But before Autolycus could retort, Cassandra's voice broke the argument. "He's waking up!"

Rowan turned from the thief and back to her patient shooing Cassandra aside as she bathed the demigod's brow.

Hercules' eyes fluttered once and slowly opened. Rowan took his face gently in her hands to stop him from any sudden movements as she spoke to him. "Can you hear me young man?"

"Wha- who? Iolaus?" he muttered blearily, moving restlessly.

"You're safe. You're brother brought you here. You're at the inn. My name is Rowan." she explained

quickly. "You friends are here. You've got a nasty gash in your head and some bruised ribs. Now lay back and rest."

Hercules sighed closing his eyes in relief, and did as he was told finding that the pain lessened the less he moved. "I dreamt . . . I saw . . . Iolaus . . ." he murmured as he drifted into sleep. His hands plucked at the cloak around him as his voice dazedly trailed off. " . . . talking about fishing . . . missed me . . . miss him. . ."

"Shh." Rowan soothed. "Get some rest young man." 

"What did he say?" Autolycus questioned in a stage whisper. Cassandra and Rowan shot him murderous glances and he lowered his tone and asked again. 

"I don't know." Cassandra replied "Something about fishing?" she said glancing worriedly at Rowan.

"Don't worry, he's just a little confused." Rowan announced expertly as she took Cassandra by the arm and Autolycus by the ear and lead them out of the room "His eyes are good, his breathing steady. He'll be just fine when he wakes up. Why don't you take the room one door down. I'll wake you if there's a change" She then turned her attention to Autolycus who was stifling cries of pain as she tweaked his ear. "As for you, go sleep. And I hope that when you wake you'll behave yourself."

"Ow! Let go of my ear!"

"Bed!" she ordered finally releasing her grip and pointing at the room.

Autolycus needed no second urging.

The next time Hercules awoke, it was daylight. He blinked in confusion as he took in his surroundings: A steely old matriarch beside him carding some wool, and Autolycus sitting on the widow ledge looking for all the world like he was sulking.

Rowan noticed he was awake first and tucked her work away and leaned forward, bringing some water to his lips.

"How are you feeling?" she asked as he finished drinking.

"Dizzy." Hercules admitted raising one hand to lightly touch his forehead.

Autolycus hopped off his perch and came over to the bed smiling now. "Hey big guy," he greeted quietly, still wary of Rowan. "You gave us quite a scare."

Hercules looked from Autolycus to Rowan in bewilderment.

"What happened?" he asked carefully. He wracked his brain but could not remember the slightest detail of how he could have ended up like this. 

"Your brother brought you in." Rowan informed him before Autolycus could get a word in edgewise.

"My brother?!" Hercules asked in surprise as he attempted to sit up. The whole world lurched sickeningly and paling Hercules lay back down.

"Don't try that again!" Rowan scolded as she tucked the blankets and the cloak tighter around the demigod. "You remember your brother? Charming boy. Absolute lady's man with a golden smile and blue eyes. You know, if I were only a young girl again . . ." Rowan mused with a distant smile.

Hercules stared puzzledly at the woman as his muddled head slowly put some connections together. "That sounds like Iolaus." Hercules admitted softly and with a touch of sadness, more to himself than her. "I dreamt that he was here. And last night . . . last night. . . " With a rush it all came back to him; the fight in the dark with the suspected thief, Iolaus warning him about some danger, and then blackness filled with the soft concerned tenor of his friend's voice flitting in and out of his dreams.

"Iolaus!" Drawing a quick breath in he almost rose again but Rowan all but pinned him down; she was remarkably strong for such a delicate looking woman, part of Hercules thought idly.

"Calm down big guy! Iolaus isn't here." Autolycus soothed in an awkward off-handed manner.

"Did he give you his name? Did he tell you anything?" Hercules demanded once the pain of his foolish attempt at verticalness had faded.

"He didn't need to give me a name young man! I've heard the stories." she assured him with a chuckle.

Hercules returned her smile with one of his own, eyes shining. *_So Iolaus was finally getting some recognition, it's about time!* _he thought to himself. Just then, carrying a tray of food, Cassandra entered.

"Hercules, you're awake!" she said with a smile, that faded into a concerned glance. "How did you get here last night?"

"That's what we're trying to figure out!" Autolycus announced smugly taking a cup of wine from the tray and sipping it appreciatively. "Supposedly *_Mistress*_ Rowan knows who he was." 

"Like I wouldn't have guessed." Rowan admitted with a little pride, ignoring the man and turning her attention back to Hercules "That smile, the way he moved, like an old woman like me wouldn't recognize the King of Thieves when she saw him!"

Autolycus spit his wine halfway across the room and despite the inherent danger of the whole idiotic situation, Hercules could do nothing but clutch his aching sides and laugh until he cried.

"It's not funny. It's not funny at all!" Autolycus announced with such a petulant tone that Hercules wouldn't be surprised if the former King of Thieves started stamping his foot.

"Stop laughing young man! Demigod or no, you'll only injure your ribs further! Your brother insisted I take care of you!" Rowan ordered strictly. "And you!" she said turning her attention to a giggling Cassandra. "Stop standing there and serve lunch!"

Hercules muffled his laughter, lying back exhausted in bed, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. Iolaus replacing Autolycus. It was just so funny! The two men never had gotten along very well after Iolaus was nearly beheaded for a crime Autolycus had committed. The very thought of Autolycus losing his job to Iolaus must make the former king green with envy!

"First of all, Mistress Rowan," Autolycus began lividly, ignoring Hercules' continuing giggles. "*I* am the King of Thieves, not that runt. And second-"

"Watch your mouth boy!" Rowan interrupted fiercely. "I'm not some easy mark for young hooligans. I've been around in my time, and I know the King of Thieves when I see him. He's new, the Golden thief, I'll grant you that, but he's got a larger reputation to the last braggart who held the title!"

"Braggart?!" Autolycus exploded. "ME!?!?!?"

"Autolycus, just give up and face it." Hercules interjected with a grin "Iolaus makes a more convincing, dashing, brave, roguish, handsome, cunning, sly-"

"All right! All right! Stop before you make me sick!" Autolycus fumed "I guess Goldilocks wasn't kidding when he told me he was once a thief." Sighing in self-pity and shooting Cassandra a dirty look because the seer was still giggling at him, he grabbed his lunch off the tray and migrated back to the window ledge to continue his sulk. "Well maybe Iolaus has *_attempted*_ to take my title, but despite the humor you find in this situation at my expense do you know what this means?" he asked deviously. "It means that your friend Iolaus stole war plans from Daedauls!" 

"No it does not." Hercules countered with wry exasperation as Rowan handed him a cup of medicine. "If you'd stopped worrying so much about your precious reputation you'd have figured it out by now. Iolaus was— is under the same curse you are."

"What curse?" Autolycus asked in bewilderment.

"Hermes' curse!" Cassandra told him in frustration "You and Iolaus must have done something to tick him off, why else would you both have had a run of back luck lately?"

"Hermes. Why that sneaky, two-timing, no-good, poor excuse for a god! It's all HIS fault! What did I ever do to him?" the former kind said with a moan, leaning his head back against the window frame and closing his eyes.

"What *_did_* you and Iolaus do to him?" Hercules asked curiously.

"It was a rhetorical question!" Autolycus replied opening one eye indignantly.

"Mine's not." the demigod informed him with a hint of warning.

"Do you remember when you had that . . . unfortunate encounter with Artemis' bow?" he asked Hercules carefully, not wanting to provoke the demigod further in case he was still sensitive about his time as a pig.

"Yeeess."

"Well to change you back Iolaus insisted that I help him steal back the bow from Discord and Ares."

"Only natural since you were responsible in the first place." Hercules put in innocently as Rowan helped him sit up in bed.

"Well, to get back Artemis' bow we needed an advantage since you were . . . indisposed at the time." he continued waving his hands about as he spoke. "I mean, you weren't around to bail your little buddy out so it was up to me Autolycus, King of Thieves!" the former king stood up regally, brushing his mustache with his fingers. 

"Yeah right!" Rowan snorted. "Like he would need *your* help!"

Hercules hid his grin by taking a spoonful of stew that he'd been handed.

"ANYWAYS!" Autolycus continued throwing the old lady a murderous glance which she met until he was forced to look away "WestoleHermes'wingedsandalsbytrickinghimintoamudmaskandmakeover." he

finished in an embarrassed rush.

Hercules laughed again. He could just see Iolaus and Autolycus tricking his vain brother and then making off with his sandals. Now he wished he'd paid more attention to his friend at the time.

"So Hermes cursed you both with bad luck for tricking him, and when Iolaus went to see him in 

Mysia . . ." Cassandra trailed off expectantly, waiting for the demigod to finish the story.

"Hermes must have demanded he steal the parchments from Ares who was ultimately responsible for this mess. Hermes could never get back at Ares on Olympus, he'd have to use a mortal to do it down here." Hercules mused aloud. "Ares must realize by now that his war plans are being stolen."

"The only thing still unaccounted for are the crystals." Cassandra put in desperately wringing her hands. "Even one of them in the wrong hands could spell disaster for countless of people!"

"Ares is not going to let them go without a fight, maybe even personally. And Iolaus is going after them." Hercules said with a sinking feeling destroying the happiness he'd felt at knowing that his best friend was alive and well. His hands clenched tightly at the bedclothes in his hands and he looked down and noticed the green cloak. He turned to Rowan and smiled sadly. "He left it here, didn't he?"

The old lady smiled fondly. "Yes. He was so worried about you when he carried you up the stairs and brought you in here. He knew he had to go, but he didn't want to leave you. Your brother cares about you very much." 

Hercules brightened slightly at her words, imagining his friend fighting his way out of the palace and getting him to safety. "I need to return the favor." he told her simply. "I need to help him. Did he tell you where he was going?"

Rowan looked away. She had promised the golden thief she now knew was called Iolaus, that she wasn't going to tell his brother anything. Suddenly a large hand grasped hers and she looked into the demigod's blue eyes. "Please."

"Partheon." she finally replied with a nod "He's headed to Partheon."

"Thank you." Hercules replied with relief as he began to swing his legs over the edge of the bed to stand up.

"Wait a minute! Just WHERE do you think you're going?" Rowan demanded standing up to blocking the demigod's path.

"I'm going after Iolaus! I can't just leave him to Ares and Hermes. He's. . . my brother."

"I don't care if he's the King of Attica!" Hercules grinned merrily at that comment, but Rowan didn't notice. "You are not well enough to go traipsing about the Greek countryside! He said you'd be a rotten patient and you are, so I've taken precautions."

"You think you can keep me here?" Hercules asked with amusement as he took in the sight of the delicate old woman waving a carding brush in his face. 

"You can't go anywhere without your clothes." she announced with a cackle. 

Hercules looked down at himself, still covered in bedclothes but obviously down to the most minimum of clothing, and blushed. Sitting down with the smug air of victory surround her, she waved him back into bed. "Now lie down and get some sleep. You are not going anywhere today. We'll talk about it tomorrow."

Hercules opened his mouth to protest but out of the corner of his eyes saw Cassandra shake her head slightly, a smile on her face. They still had time. Sighing in defeat, Hercules flopped back on the featherbed, his ribs and head immediately complaining about the force of the movement. *_Beaten_,*

he thought, *beaten by a fiery old matron. What could possibly be more embarrassing? I bet that's why Iolaus charmed her in the first place.* he thought with a grin as he closed his eyes. Cassandra was sure they still had time. Deciding to make the best of it, Hercules gave into sleep.

Iolaus made relatively good time to Partheon, but if anyone had been watching his progress in the early hours of the morning after he'd caught a few hours of sleep, they would have thought him mad.

He kept stopping in the middle of the road and looking back at Mytilene, retreating in the distance, wishing for all the world he could go back. He'd take a few steps backtracking the way he came, and then he'd shake himself and with new purpose strode onward to Partheon.

Half a league later he would slow and then stop and turn around again.

*_Maybe I should go back and check_* Iolaus thought nervously fidgeting. *_I mean, that was a nasty head wound. He needs me.* _

*Besides just what was he doing in Mytilene? What if he was looking for me and needs me for something urgent?*

Shaking him head with a bittersweet irony at the ridiculous thought of the strongest man in the world seeking HIM out for help, Iolaus turned back in the direction of his next target. _*Besides_,* he told himself as he went _*I'm doing something urgent right now. I'm foiling Ares' plans all by myself_.*

Smiling in pride at the thought of him getting back at the god of war after he'd been humiliated that one day chained to Autolycus, he continued on strongly for about half a dozen strides before he halted again and unwittingly spoke aloud.

"If I'm doing such a great job against Ares myself, why do I wish Hercules was here?" Iolaus threw up his hands in exasperation and rubbed his chin in thought.

"Oh will you stop whining and get moving?" a voice complained above him and Iolaus nearly jumped out of his skin. Pulling out his sword he looked around for the intruder. "Put the sword away Iolaus. Like you could kill me!" someone, Hermes Iolaus realized, announced smugly.

"Thanks a lot Hermes, I'll never have the hiccups again." Iolaus muttered darkly as he sheathed his blade. "What do you want?"

"I'm here to find out why you keep walking back the way you came! It's driving me bonkers to watch you travel. You keep turning in circles." In the early morning light, the trickster god flittered down to hover some three feet above the ground.

"That's none of your business." Iolaus retorted sharply, embarrassed and angry that the god had been spying on him. Crossing his arms defensively he glared at the god. 

"Come on Iolaus, Hercules will be fine. I've checked in on him myself. He told me to tell you to be careful."

"He wasn't at all curious about what I was doing?" Iolaus asked suspiciously.

"Of course not! I told him you were working off a debt and that I'd take care of you and he reluctantly agreed." Hermes said innocently placing one hand dramatically over his heart.

"Oh." Iolaus replied, feeling a little silly for his mistrust, but then his doubts flared up again. "But then why was Hercules in the palace last night? What in Hades' was he doing there? There's no way he'd be working for the king!"

Hermes flustered slightly and tried valiantly to cover it. "He was um . . . scouting and he heard rumors of war and-"

"Don't lie to me Hermes! I may be mortal but I'm not stupid. Was he following me?" Iolaus demanded.

Hermes latched onto that idea quicker than lightening. "He was concerned when he got your message, and I naturally wouldn't tell him anything so he's been scouting around the last couple of weeks trying to find out where you are and what I've *_supposedly_* done to you." the god finished with a raised eyebrow and a mocking tone, waving his wand around vaguely. Seeing that Iolaus was pondering the situation carefully, Hermes pressed his advantage. "You're almost done Iolaus, just one more heist to go. So just

hand over the parchments and head off to Partheon and don't worry about Hercules."

The golden thief snapped out of his revive quickly. "Oh no!" he said backing away from the god. "The plans stay with me. I'm not giving anything to anyone until I figure this whole mess out."

"Why Iolaus," Hermes said in wide eyed surprise as he fluttered down lower. "Don't you trust me?"

"Not on your life." Iolaus said firmly, the harsh words tempered with a mischievous grin. "Now if you don't mind, I have to finish what I started." Turning from the god, Iolaus headed determinedly off to

Partheon. "Ares has ordered his followers there to move the crystals out sometime after noon tomorrow towards his first target to the north. If you can't steal them while at the garrison headquarters, you'll have to ambush the caravan." Hermes called out after him.

"Thanks for the warning." Iolaus called back lifting his hand in acknowledgment of the advice.

"Be careful Iolaus." Hermes whispered fondly as he watched the retreating figure of his chosen. "I'd hate to loose you so close to end game." 

It was dawn of the following morning by the time Iolaus arrived and gained access to the garrison storehouse of Partheon. Half a score of men outside unnaturally and quietly 'slept' as the golden thief searched for his prize. 

Inside a covered false wagon bed Iolaus found what he was looking for. 

"Gotcha!" he grinned in glee and with a flourish pulled back the cloth covering and revealed the fruits of his labor. "Rocks?" he asked himself in disgust. "I came all this way to steal rocks from Ares?!" 

Climbing up into the wagon, Iolaus reached into water-filled buckets and plucked out one of the darken rough crystals. "This is the great secret weapon? What does Ares hope to do with these?" Iolaus said with a laugh "throw them at the enemy?"

Putting words into actions, he was just about to lob the crystal out the window when the clamor of approaching soldiers could be heard, fumbling for the lock outside.

Cursing under his breath, Iolaus dropped down into the wagon bed and threw the cloth covering over himself and held as still as he possibly could among the buckets. The conversation he overheard did nothing to assure him.

"My Lord Ares, we are prepared and move out at noon."

The gravely low voice of the dark immortal answered and it was all Iolaus could do but repress a groan. This heist was going south fast. "Excellent Traxim, you are the only one of my incompetent followers who've managed to hold onto the gifts I have granted you in thanks of your patronage."

"You honor us with your words, my Lord. We will do everything in our power to make you proud, oh mighty god of War."

*Geez talk about kissing up!* Iolaus groused silently. *_It's bad enough I'm stuck here, but do I have to listen to this dribble?_* The thief quickly turned his attention back to the god and the warlord as their

voices approached the wagon. 

"Still, despite your vigilance in this affair, I'd rather be safe than sorry." Ares mused darkly as he eyed the cache of crystals. "Rumors from Mytilene and their ineffectual king and soldiers give reports that sound

like the work of my half-mortal half-brother." 

Iolaus heard the immortal spit in disgust and ground his teeth together to keep from losing his temper. "If he's got even half a brain in that pathetic demigod body of his, he'll figure out to come here in search of the crystals. So Traxim, I want the guard doubled and this lot sent on to meet your encamped army within a sunswidth. By tomorrow I want to see, hear, and smell War rising like red fog from the plains of Calydon. By the end of this week, the whole province of Arcadia should be yours."

"Your will shall be done, mighty Ares." Traxim gushed, saluting the immortal by thumping hard on his armored chest.

There was a scent of ozone and the sound of cascading light energy and smoke that usually accompanied the vanishing of a god, and then nothing. Iolaus tensed in his hiding place waiting, wondering what would happen next.

"Guards!" Traxim roared as he reached for the false wagon bed. "Prepare to move out!"

Before Iolaus could think, or even take another breath, the wooden cover slammed down ontop of him and the crystals, effectively trapping him. 

Hissing angrily between his teeth he shifted between the buckets, feeling the slosh of water on his legs. Raising his head off the wooden floor of sorts, and knocking his head on the 'ceiling' he listened to the dim voices outside, waiting for them to move off and let him get out of this box.

"Things not going so well, hmmm?" a voice, distant as the wind whispered to him.

"Hermes?" Iolaus gasped, nearly knocking over a bucket with his surprise.

"I'm in your head Iolaus! Don't be stupid enough to give yourself away now!" the god scoffed.

"Well?" Iolaus asked in a demanding whisper.

"Well what?" the presence replied in confusion.

"Are you going to help me get out of here?"

"Why would I do that Iolaus? *_You're_* the King of Thieves. And besides, if a month is too little time to get the job done, we'll just have to extend your services to me for another month won't we?" Hermes suggested with a laugh

"Like Tartarus you will!" Iolaus hissed. Hermes' reply if any was lost to Iolaus however since the alarm was raised somewhere in the garrison and Traxim started ordering men to find the disturbance and crush it like a bug.

*_Melodramatic buffoon_!* the golden thief thought rolling his eyes. *_But at least this gives me the opportunity I need.* _

As soon as the last of the troops left by Iolaus' reckoning of footsteps, he reached up and pushed a knot in the wood out with his hand and spying though the cracks in the boards, picked the lock.

*_Am I good, or am I?_* he thought to himself, elation returning. He'd beat Hermes at his own game even if it killed him!

Throwing off the plank of wood Iolaus bounded to his feet, standing and stretching among the buckets. *_Now how am I going to carry all of these_?* he wondered as he fingered the piece of crystal in his hand, but before he could put any plan into action the cries of battle from outside reached his ears. 

"Ares was right! Kill the bastard son of Zeus!" 

With a start he realized it was Hercules. *_Damn he must have followed me! He couldn't possibly be well enough after that hit to the head to take on Ares now!_* Iolaus thought wildly. *_Hermes must have lied about talking to him in Mytilene, maybe he didn't even deliver my first message either!*_

"Hermes, I'll kill you for this!" Iolaus roared, shaking his fist at the sky, and then realized how ridiculous that must have sounded and rephrased the threat. "I'll make you wish you'd never been born!"

*_There, that sounded better_!* the golden thief thought to himself with a little pride as he lept off the wagon. "To Tartarus with the crystals, I've gotta help Herc." he muttered as he left the storehouse in a dead run. 

"I'm sorry! It's not my fault! It's not my fault!"

"Autolycus will you just shut up!?" Hercules demanded as he threw off three guards who were trying to bludgeon him to death with their spears. "I *_know_* it's not your fault! I know you didn't mean to fall down the stairs! Will you stop whining and help me here!?"

Swallowing his wounded pride, Autolycus joined the fight with his usual cry and a double flip, landing him ontop of a half a score of men, flattening most, and thumping the rest soundly. He nearly got speared once had not Cassandra lashed out with a staff she'd become very adept at using in such a short time.

"Thanks." the greenclad thief waved.

"Don't thank me, thank Rowan. She lent me the staff." Cassandra announced with a grin and a wink as she ducked back into her hiding place where she waited like a spider at the heroes backs for soldiers.

"She likes me." Autolycus told Hercules with a grin.

Hercules rolled his eyes and merely sighed.

For several frantic minutes Hercules, Autolycus, and Cassandra deflected waves of attacks as they ran and ducked into the main house gateway, obviously the home of the warlord judging by the decor.

"Is it just me, or are they running out of men?" Autolycus asked as he rested during an all to brief respite from fighting, hands on his knees, panting.

"There should be more, much more." Hercules mused. "Either most of their army has already left for battle or . . ."

"Or what?" the former king prodded impatiently. 

"Or we have help." Hercules replied gazing back out at the courtyard.

Iolaus led some 20 troops on a merry chase round the garrison, finally managing to trap them in one of the practice room. Slamming the door with resounding finality on the stuptified men and barring their escape, the golden thief rubbed his hands in satisfaction. But it was short lived.

Most of the troops were already waiting for the crystals in Calydon.

Iolaus' musings were cut short by the appearance of yet some more soldiers. Sighing with impatience, he snapped his wrist bringing out his grappling hook. "Allyop!" He cried as he pulled himself out of harms way up onto the roof.

"Did you hear that?" Autolycus asked halting in the corridor, cocking his head.

"Hear what?" Cassandra asked impatiently. 

Looking down at the now swearing soldiers, Iolaus laughed and began to pick his way across the slightly slanted roof of the main house when an all to familiar sound of godly arrival nearly startled him into falling. 

Swallowing hard, Iolaus held out his hands to his sides and crouched slightly, defensively. "Ares."

"You!" the god spat in return. "You're the thief!" 

"Maybe." Iolaus conceded cockily as he fingered the crystal in his hand, warm in his palm.

"Do you know how many of my plans you've ruined? How many months of work? Do you have any idea what you've DONE?!"

"I have some idea" Iolaus confessed with a raised eyebrow and a grin. 

"Someone put you up to this!" Ares continued to rant, practically frothing at the mouth. "You're too stupid to come up with this on your own, and my do-gooder half brother would choose a more direct approach. Who? Tell me who!"

"You insult me and then expect me to spill my guts for you?" Iolaus said with a mocking laugh, confident now as the crystal heated in his hand and he began to gain some idea about the power it held "Not on your pathetic life." 

"Speaking of guts . . ." Ares growled as he clenched his hands into firsts of blue energy.

*_Ohh-boy!_* Iolaus thought as he began to back up ever so slowly. *_I only get one chance at this! I hope this works!_* Clenching the crystal as tight as he could he called out with a grin on his face.

"Hey Ares! Catch!"

Iolaus threw the crystal with all his might at the god of war just as the dark god was about to release his lighting. The combined energies collided with an explosion that shot down through the whole building, and rocked the very foundations of the main house, almost throwing Iolaus off the roof.

Grabbing onto whatever would support them, both soldiers and the three wayward heroes, weathered the storm as best they could down at the second floor of the main house. Cassandra held onto the demigod as if for dear life, unable to hold back a scream of remembered fright. Hercules held onto her tight, trying to calm her even as she slipped halfway into a vision.

"Hercules! Something's happened! The vision changes! The storm approaches once more! Death, blood, war. Trust me, believe me, we must do something!" she begged, tears of desperation streaming down her face. 

"What?" he asked her as the walls trembled and bits of ceiling plaster and tiles fell like meteors. "What should we do?" 

Gasping out sobs she shook her head. "I don't know!" she wailed. 

Fingers digging into the roof, Iolaus carefully rose to his feet, holding his head, as the building unsteadily rocked beneath his feet. *_Or is it just me?*_ he wondered dizzily. He looked over at the even-now recovering god and part of his dazed mind yelled at him to get the Hades out of there.

With a flexing of his wrist, he brought out his grappling hook and drunkenly spying a stone arch way that connected the main building to the storehouse roof, Iolaus launched the hook.

"You- you-you pathetic, cowardly, runt of a **MORTAL**!" Ares roared from behind him.

"I love you too Ares!" Iolaus called out impertinently, spitting once behind his shoulder before he jumped off the swaying roof.

"You won't get away this time little man!" the god of war screamed in fury as he lashed out with a lightning blot that would fry the thief to a crisp. 

But Ares missed.

His lighting went wide hitting not the blond but the arch instead, obliterating it.

The line went slack in Iolaus' grasp and he looked up almost resignedly, without fear at the ton of rock above him, and fell without a sound.

"Autolycus!" Hercules roared over the sound of splintering wood. The former king whipped his head around and understanding without words leapt out a convenient window. Hercules looked down at Cassandra, her face tearstained, but her jaw firmly set. Standing as steadily as she could in the rocking room, she nodded at Hercules. 

The demigod wasted no time. Quickly swinging the seer up in his arms, he followed Autolycus out of the window.

Landing in a crouch amid the courtyard dust next to the bounding kleptomaniac, Hercules looked up and behind his shoulder at the roof, squinting in the midmorning sun, trying to figure out what had caused the

explosion. Hercules couldn't make out much in the bright sunlight, not until he saw an all to familiar bolt of immortal lightning lash out from the rooftop.

"Ares," he spat in disgust, following the path of the deadly energy to see its target.

Autolycus and Cassandra watched too as the blue electricity struck the stone archway to their left, shattering its massive stone structure into boulder-like proportions. But that's not what caught Hercules' eye.

Rising to his feet as if propelled by a catapult, he blindly shoved Cassandra into Autolycus' arms and uncaringly rushed towards the rain of rock.

"Hercules?" Cassandra gasped in surprise.

"Hercules, are you _crazy_?! What are you doing?! You'll be killed!!" Autolycus yelled taking a few steps after the demigod when a rock the size of a horse blocked his path.

But Hercules was beyond caring about his safety, and his reply was in a single soul-wrenching cry.

"IOLAUS!"

The golden thief blinked, trying to rid himself of a puzzling vertigo that gripped him more strongly than the pain in his head. He stared up at the incredibly blue sky and smiled. *_Nice day_* Iolaus mused, feeling as if the very seconds were stretching into eternities. *_Perfect for hunting and fishing with Herc_.* For a moment concern struck him the same way rocks and stones pelted him now. *_Where was Herc_?* Iolaus twisted his body trying to look around him in the chaos for his friend *_He should be right here. . ._* 

He heard his name over the roar that filled his ears and looked up instinctively, his brother's name on his lips just in time to meet the plummeting missile head on.

Hercules raised his gauntlets to bat away the hail of stones as if they were nothing more than annoying flies. Fueled by adrenaline and panic he plowed a path directly to the center of the disaster even as the main building to his left began to crumble and collapse.

He could barely make out his partner in the falling debris, but trusted his heart, not his impeded sight and reached up and forward with his arms to catch his friend.

Iolaus' momentum and dead weight drove Hercules to his knees to absorb the shock. Holding his still friend close to his chest, Hercules raised his arms to cover their heads as the onslaught of boulders descended, giving them no time to run for cover.

Cassandra and Autolycus could only watch in horror as the two heroes were buried under the timber and stone. 

"Is he . . .? Are they . . . ?" Cassandra asked brokenly as she dashed blindly through the cloud of dust over to the disaster area, Autolycus hot on her heels.

Autolycus waved his hands about, coughing and slowly shook his head. Cassandra wilted visibly covering her mouth with her hands, dropping her staff.

"No . . ." she whispered.

"There is no way anyone could have survived that." the thief admitted haltingly, placing a consoling hand on her shaking shoulder. "Not even the two . . . greatest heroes the known world has had the pleasure of knowing. This-this tragic end, this noble sacrifice in the name of friendship and . . . loyalty, brotherhood and love will live on beyond you and me Cassandra."

The seer turned to look at Autolycus' sincere tear-filled eyes and nodded gratefully. "Whenever great deeds are remembered," he continued, his tone soft and mournful as he swallowed the ever larger lump that was growing in his throat. "There will be two names that stand out before all the rest: Hercules, Son of Zeus, half-immortal champion of men, and Iolaus, hunter, warrior, hero, a-and-and . . ." Autolycus' voice broke and he violently slashed his sleeve across his eyes "the best gosh-darned friend a guy

could have!"

"Gee Autolycus," a faint lighthearted tenor broke the silence. "I never knew you cared."

"Iolaus?" the former king of thieves gasped as he scanned the wreckage.

"Iolaus? Hercules? You're alive!" Cassandra cried as she spied them amid the broken beams and rock. Picking her way over to where she saw movement in the now settling dustcloud she laughingly began to help the two, battered, bruised and bleeding men out of their tomb.

"How did you-?" she asked as a dustcovered Hercules rose to his feet, supporting himself heavily on her shoulder, a dazed Iolaus propped up against him with one strong arm. "This isn't the first time Iolaus and I have been trapped under falling rocks." Hercules informed her with a weak grin.

"It happens to him more than it does me." Iolaus put in with a conspiratorial whisper and a wink.

The three of them turned towards Autolycus who was sputtering in embarrassment. Hercules and Iolaus exchanged knowing grins before Hercules called out teasingly to the greenclad thief.

"Autolycus, I'd like to thank you for that moving and touching eulogy."

"Yeah, remind me to have you speak at my funeral the next time I die."Iolaus put in with a laugh.

Hercules glared down at his friend and shook him none too gently.

"Hey what was that for?" Iolaus demanded as he tried to stop the world from spinning as he stared into his friend's now haunted eyes.

"Don't even *_think*_ such thoughts!" Hercules scolded, voice rough with emotion. "You're not going anywhere!"

"I wouldn't dream of it." Iolaus relied softly placing a hand on his friend's arm before he steadied himself on his feet and began to pick his way across the rubble only to fall flat on his face after two steps. 

Hercules moved to help him, when he too lost his balance and flopped down, hard, next to the golden thief.

"Well this is pretty pathetic." Iolaus reported to the world at large with a giggle. "The '_two greatest heroes the known world has had the pleasure of knowing_,'" he quoted in a tremulous and shaky reproduction of Autolycus' remorseful tone that quickly gave into laughter "can't even stand up."

"You'll heal." an unexpected voice assure him from above drowning out Autolycus' indignant sputter. Iolaus didn't have to raise his head to identify the source of the words, though Cassandra, Hercules, and Autolycus did.

"Hermes, nice to see you again, you double-dealing, two-faced, no-good--"

"Tut, tut! Is that anyway to speak to your benefactor and patron Iolaus?" Hermes asked as he fluttered down so that if Iolaus exerted enough effort he'd be able to raise his head and see the god's winged sandals. "Well you're in no condition to get the crystals now, and the month is almost up. I guess you're mine for another month then." The trickster sighed in false self-pity "I'll just have to hunt up some more interesting projects to fill your time once you relieve Ares of the crystals."

Iolaus gritted his teeth at the god's words, somehow finding the energy to rise to his feet, only to fall back down again disoriented and breathless. 

"Iolaus!" Hercules raised a hand as he sat up to prevent his mortal friend from trying such a stupid stunt again. "Hermes, you have no right at all to ask this of him. This is Ares we're talking about! You're just too chicken-liveried to go after him yourself so you're having Iolaus do your dirty work!"

Hermes fumed at his half-brother's words, pride wounded. "I'm not stopping him Hercules. He can get up and go after the crystals if he wants to." 

"He can't even keep his balance! Ares tried to fry him and then drop a building and a half on his head!" the demigod replied indignantly as he crawled the few feet it was to his friend's side, shifting him into a more comfortable position.

"Hercules is right, it isn't fair! Not to Iolaus or me!" Autolycus interrupted. "You've been plaguing me for over a month now. You've had your fun! You've played your little game, humiliated Ares, me, and

goldilocks over there; You've made your point!" 

"Besides!" Cassandra put in, getting over her awe at seeing her first immortal. "Ares will use the crystals at the plains of Calydon and kill hundreds of innocents. I know what the crystals can do, believe me it's

not pretty. In the hands of the god of war, it could mean mass destruction, death, and famine."

Hermes fidgeted, feeling his usually silent conscience poking him rather strongly. "Oh all right!" he allowed sullenly. Pouting for a moment, he turned his attention to his new king. "Iolaus do you want to go and stop the crystals from arriving in Calydon?"

Iolaus blinked and nodded slightly, immediately regretting the action as vertigo swept him. "Sure."

Hermes waved his wand over the golden thief. "Done!" he proclaimed.

And Iolaus vanished.

Iolaus suddenly found himself next to a rutted road about a league away from the garrison. Looking down the road he saw the wagon convoy approaching. Traxim and two other guards were the only ones present. Obviously he and Hercules had dealt with the rest. Gripping his scabbard with his left hand, he reached for his sword with his right when a sharp pain shot through his side. Looking down at his no longer numb right arm, he could see that the shoulder had been dislocated and he'd just unpinched

the nerve that had kept him from feeling it. 

Glancing back at the fast approaching wagon, Iolaus realized he'd have to think of something fast since there was no time to reset the shoulder and stop the crystals from reaching their destination. 

Traxim urged the driver of the wagon to move faster. He could disappoint Lord Ares now! If they hurried they might reach Calydon's plains with some daylight to spare.

Suddenly the draft horses' ears pricked and his own mount snorted and pawed the ground. Suddenly from further down the road an unearthly howl, sounding like the cross between a rabid wolf and a wonder hydra, seemed to split the air asunder spooking both men and horses.

"What was that?" the driver gasped in fright standing up in the driver's seat, scanning the woods anxiously.

The horses pranced nervously, and the howl sounded again, this time closer.

Suddenly a shaft of silver zipped through the air cutting the tracings and harness of the draft horses. Snorting and neighing in panic, the animals bolted dragging the shocked driver with them.

"Who goes there?" the remaining solider barked as he and the warlord began to draw their weapons, but before the guardsman had his free of his scabbard a stone hit him on the head and he fell off the wagon and into the dust.

*_Two down_.* Iolaus thought to himself as he braced himself against a convenient and considerate tree. *_One boot-licking warlord to go!*_

"HERMES! Bring him** BACK**!" Hercules roared rising to his feet faster than the trickster god thought his half-brother was capable of, wounded as he was.

"He doesn't want to come back." Hermes replied innocently.

"I will damn you straight to Tartarus for this!" Hercules vowed grabbing the god by his tunic front and shaking him soundly where he hovered. "You sent Iolaus into battle barely able to stay awake, much less fight!" 

Hermes attempted to free himself from the iron grip by batting at Hercules with his hissing wand that didn't like to be shook anymore than he did. "Don't worry. The trip alone probably knocked him out! He'll just lie in the woods until you go and pick him up. And he will be safe." the immortal soothed. "Artemis likes him too much to let him go unprotected in her domain."

"So that's it Hermes?" Hercules spat at his immortal brother "You have no intention of ever letting Iolaus out of your service. This was just to placate him, me, Autolycus, all of us!"

"He was mine once, and he has more than proved himself over the past month." Hermes said seriously. "At first it was about revenge, pure and simple. I stole from Daedalus and then deposited my gifts outside of Discord's door--"

"You WHAT?" Cassandra all but screeched, before Hercules could say a word. "You gave the god of war possibly the most destructive force known to man to get revenge for a trick?!"

"Gods do it all the time Cassandra." Hercules informed her bitterly. "They play in mortals lives because they have nothing better to do." 

Hermes chose to ignore that remark, all of the Olympians knew of Hercules' odd take on immortality and the ways the gods used their powers. "I was going to give them back to Daedalus when I was done." he all but whined. Seeing Hercules' expression, he quickly changed the subject.

"He was good, you friend, he always was. Lets just say that after a while I got a little attached to the idea of having both him and Autolycus in my service. I'm not popular in the ways of petitions and temples like

Aphrodite and Ares, but having legendary rogues, that's a different story!" Hermes told his brother smugly. "Having one was fun, but having both of them would be incredible!"

Hercules released his brother in disgust and shot Autolycus a dark glance since the man seemed to swell and preen at the gods words.

"Send us to Iolaus."

"You can walk, it's just a few-"

"Now." Hercules ordered with a quiet intensity that had Hermes shivering inside. 

"Oh-Kay!" Hermes said with a sigh. "But he's still mine Hercules. At least for another month." And with a wave of his sulking snakes the garrison around the thief, the seer and the demigod melted into a road

surrounded by trees where Iolaus and another man, a soldier, lay rolling in the dirt pounding one another senseless.

"Iolaus?" Hercules rushed over to his friend.

Traxim looked up, distracted from his task, thus giving Iolaus the opportunity he needed. With one slamming punch, the warlord was out. Stumbling, the golden thief struggled to his feet, only to fall again and was about to resort to crawling towards the wagon when Hercules was there, supporting him in his arms. With his brother's help Iolaus reached out and touched the wagon which promptly disappeared along with the scrolls tucked in a pouch at Iolaus' waist.

Miles away in Calydon, the buckets with the crystals appeared with the parchments before a stunned Daedalus.

Blinking in surprise the inventor could only shake his head and wonder how Hercules had done it this time. 

In the temple of war Ares let out a howl of rage and was about to smash his seeing mirror when the taunting voice of Hermes echoed through the room.

"Temper, temper brother! What do you expect when the god of trickster's supply Discord with the weapons?" he gloated with a laugh. 

Ares spun around to face Discord who was even now trying to make her escape, her face even more pale than usual. 

"Ares?" she held up her hands in defense as she begged "I didn't know they were from Hermes! Ares! Please! NO!"

Hermes chuckled in satisfaction, leaving the two dark immortals to their anger and frustration. *I've beat Ares, but lost Iolaus* Leaning back on his plush couch with a sigh he scratched his arm idly with his wand.

"Damn."

"Herc?" Iolaus asked blinking several times to make sure that the wagon was really gone and he was not just seeing things.

"Yeah?"

Iolaus turned to look up at his friend, a black eye soon to be evident "I keep falling down."

"I've noticed." Hercules replied with a smile. 

"I can't stand up, and I think I've dislocated my shoulder." Iolaus informed him with slow careful deliberateness.

"I know buddy." he assured his partner soothingly. 

"Good." Iolaus said nodding and regretting it. "Then you take care of it." And with that the blond thief went limp in his brother's arms.

The world swam by with a thousand lurid shapes and colors that did nothing to help Iolaus' vertigo. His hands desperately clutched at the ground, sometimes finding dirt, sometimes branches.

*_Head wound*_ some part of him whispered. 

*_No_* something else countered. *_Your equilibrium is shot to Tartarus_.* 

*_You're both wrong_!* a paranoid voice intruded *_we're dead! We're dead! We're dea_-*

*_Oh shut-up_!* Iolaus roared and they all quieted. He turned his attention back to what had brought him up out of darkness in the first place. It was voices not dizziness that had awaken him. Hands on his chest and then touching his throbbing arm. Before Iolaus could piece together what was going on, there was a sharp pressure, a yank, and a sickening crack.

Gasping in pain as agony flaired in his arm and shoulder, eyes snapping open in instinctive fury, Iolaus swung with his good arm at the blurred form leaning over him shadowed by the sun and trees.

A stronger grasp met his attack, halting it in midair not only physically but with words as well. "Iolaus! It's all right, it's me." an all too familiar voice soothed "I'm sorry, I know that hurt. Just rest my friend, rest." 

*_Hercules_* he realized at last with a relieved sigh. Everything was all right. For what seemed like a moment, Iolaus relaxed taking his friend's advice, letting out one slow cleansing breath before opening his eyes. 

To his surprise it was dark, night had fallen and he was not in the forest, but in a strange room lying in an unfamiliar bed. Turning his head to the side Iolaus instinctively searched for Hercules and caught sight of his partner dozing in a chair close-by.

Satisfied and comforted that his friend was near Iolaus took stock of the situation. He wriggled his body from head to toe listening carefully for any protesting muscles or twinges of pain. Surprisingly he felt well, except for some sore bruises and a stiffness in his shoulder. 

*_Not just well_* he thought suddenly *_I feel great_!*

Smiling, Iolaus sat up, swung his legs over the side and stood, wrapping one of the bedclothes around his waist. Noticing the open window and wondering where they were, the blond stood and made his way towards the window.

He hadn't taken four steps before he abruptly crashed to the floor with a grunt of surprise.

Hercules awoke with a jump, blinking and trying to figure out what had disturbed him. Eyes searching and finding an empty bed the demigod sat up worried. "Iolaus?"

"Over here." the muffled reply came.

Gripping the arms of the chair Hercules whipped around and then rose suddenly to his feet at the sight of the crumpled figure on the floor. 

"Iolaus?!" Rushing over, the demigod helped the thief sit up. "Iolaus are you all right? Does anything hurt? How do you feel?"

To his surprise his friend was grinning, even suppressing a chuckle. "Herc, do you remember that cat that got its whiskers shaved a little short on one side?"

Raising a concerned eyebrow in the dark, Hercules eyed his friend warily. "Uh . . . Iolaus," he began slowly "I think you should just lie down and try to rest and-"

"No, no, no, no." the blond replied rapidly shaking his head and waving his hands in hyper disagreement as he pushed to his feet. After a moment, the demigod joined him, holding him steady. Iolaus however didn't appreciate the help and shrugged it off, eagerly trying to explain. "Remember the cat Herc?" he pressed "The one that used to hang around in the stables and the kitchen at the Academy?"

Realizing they'd be no stopping his friend until he finished telling him whatever crazy thoughts were surfacing, Hercules nodded and surreptitiously as possible tried to reach out to touch Iolaus' forehead to check for fever.

"Remember what happened cause its whiskers were uneven? Herc lay off, I feel great!" Iolaus brushed his friend's concerned hand away. "Remember what happened?" the blond didn't even wait for Hercules to reply as he bounced up and down on the balls of his feet. "Look, look I'll show you." And before the demigod could grab him, Iolaus started walking towards the window. This time he barely made one and a half steps before tipping over. Bracing himself, but only slightly he fell to the floor giggling hysterically.

"Whattaya think Herc?" Iolaus asked eyes bright and eager.

Letting out a snort of amusement, Hercules dropped to a crouch and placed a hand on the blonde's shoulder, smiling fondly. "I think the medicine Asclepius prescribed has made you loopy."

Letting out a whistling breath of disbelief Iolaus shook his head. "Nah, I feel great!"

"I'm sure you do." Hercules agreed, ducking his head to hide an honest laugh. "Why don't you get back into bed and feel great from there?"

For some reason Iolaus found that incredibly funny and started giggling like a maniac.

*_Oh brother_!* Hercules thought, rolling his eyes in amusement as he helped Iolaus to his feet. *_Asclepius wasn't kidding.* _

"Y'know Herc, I was a pretty good thief." Iolaus informed him as the demigod began to lead him back to the bed. 

"Yes you were, and you saved a lot of lives." Hercules agreed grinning now. He couldn't help it: Iolaus' happiness, inane as it was, was contagious. 

"Maybe even better than Autolycus. Maybe he should give up thieving and start writing eulogies." the blond started laughing now, obviously remembering the former king's tender words. Abruptly he broke off and turned quite seriously to look into Hercules' eyes. "I missed you." he said and began to fall over again.

Hercules grabbed Iolaus before he toppled. "I missed you too buddy." 

"Good." the hunter replied, slapping his friend on the back. "Let's go fishing."

"Ah . . . we'll go a little bit later." Hercules assured him.

"I'll even let you use rocks instead of a line." Iolaus pleaded as he attempted to move towards the door.

Hercules doggedly held onto the hunter's arm refusing to let go.

"Hercules I can't leave my arm behind with you." Iolaus scolded him. "If I do, you'll just have to carry it along. I can't reel fish in like this."

Hercules hesitated, trying to make heads or tails of what his friend was saying and then decided to just give up. "Iolaus . . ."

"Hey! We'll go catfishing!" his partner suddenly decided. "And then we'll put it in a bucket and make it's whiskers uneven and watch it fall down before we eat it."

"Watch the fish fall down." Hercules repeated totally deadpan. 

"Uh-huh." Iolaus nodded eagerly.

"Oooh-kay. Iolaus, I think it's best if we wait until morning and then we'll decide what to do."

Iolaus let his friend help him back in bed. "Grappling hooks are important Herc, they can help you run an army. Soldiers get sloppy in their drills and stop listening to you. And tapestries, don't let anyone sell you any tapestries, they're all thieves in disguise."

"I'll remember that Iolaus." he agreed nodding to placate his distracted partner. 

Satisfied, Iolaus' head was less than a millimeter from the pillow when he sat up again pushing the blankets away.

"Whoa, wait a minute buddy. Where are you going?" Hercules asked holding up a hand to stop his friend from rising.

"The window. I wanna see where we are." Iolaus informed him matter-of-factly.

"Why don't you just ask me?" Hercules queried in confusion.

Iolaus seemed to ponder this for a long moment staring at the wall in distraction. "I don't know." he finally said at last, breaking down into irreverent giggles once again.

Shaking his head with fond exasperation, Hercules pressed the hunter back down and covered him again. "We're in Partheon. The king imprisoned Traxim and his remaining men, and sent word to Calydon that the army was there. It's all been taken care of, so just lie still and Go To Sleep."

"I've just *_been_* asleep, now I wanna *_be_* awake."

"You were unconscious, there's a difference, now you need to sleep." Hercules countered firmly.

"You're crazy, you know that." Iolaus told him as he closed his eyes with a laugh.

"_I'm_ crazy?" Hercules asked indignantly. "What about y--"

But Iolaus wasn't listening, he was already asleep.

Flopping back into his chair, Hercules laughed softly. "You always get the last word, don't you my friend. Let's just hope you make more sense the next time you wake up." he said reaching over to brush back his brother's hair. "Good-night Iolaus."

The next time Iolaus opened his eyes to greet the world, it was daylight and Hercules' cornflower blue eyes were watching him intently. "Hey buddy. How're you feeling?"

Iolaus blinked slowly. "Okay." he replied.

"Water?" the demigod offered.

Nodding, Iolaus reached for the proffered cup, drinking deeply. Over the rim he caught Hercules' watchful gaze. "What?"

"What what?" 

"What's with that look?" Iolaus clarified gesturing with the cup at Hercules.

"Nothing." the demigod replied innocently.

"No really, what? You look at me like I've turned purple again." The blond propped himself tentatively up on one elbow. "Is something wrong?"

"No, I'm just trying to guess if that the medicine I gave you for your equilibrium problem has worn off." Hercules admitted under Iolaus' piercing gaze.

"Why?" 

"Because . . . it had some odd side effects." Hercules explained slowly, gesturing with his hands

"Side effects?" Iolaus repeated, voice rising "Like what?" he asked a little nervous.

"Do you remember the cat at the Academy?" 

Iolaus blinked and then stared at Hercules as if he'd grown another head "What has that got to do with anything?"

"That's exactly what I was thinking." Hercules agreed.

Iolaus digested that for a moment and then let out a breath in exasperation and annoyance. "What?" he asked in bafflement.

"The cat. At the Academy. You kept talking about it." Hercules clarified, obviously delighting in his friend's confusion "You thought it was very funny."

"I did?" Iolaus asked with surprise.

Hercules nodded, warming to the subject. "You also wanted to go fishing."

"Well what's odd about that?"

"Well you wanted to go right then and there in the middle of the night wearing a sheet. And you wanted to catch a catfish to watch it fall."

"Huh? Watch it fall from what?"

"Not from what, from in a bucket of water." Hercules replied almost gleefully.

The hunter's eyes widened but Hercules didn't give him a chance to respond, he was on a roll. "And then you started giving me advice about buying tapestries."

"What?!"

"Oh and you wanted to remind me that to have my soldiers be efficient in their drilling I needed a grappling hook." he added helpfully. 

"Hercules, are you feeling all right?" Iolaus asked warily "How's your head?"

"My head is fine." the demigod replied with a laugh.

"Then what in Tartarus are you **talking** about?!" The hunter suddenly roared.

"I'm just repeating what you told me." Hercules defended innocently.

"Yeah right!" Iolaus muttered darkly, flopping back onto the bed. "You're just jealous cause I got to beat Ares all by myself." the blond said slyly. 

Hercules sobered at the memory of the lightning blot and the rain of boulders, his falling friend . . . "Why didn't you tell me what you were doing?" he demanded.

"Hermes said he sent a message to you while you were in Calydon." Iolaus insisted, "And he said he checked in on you at Mytilene and told me you were okay."

"And you *_believed* _him?"

"Well, yeah at first." Iolaus admitted more than a little defensive. "But when I was after the crystals I sorta figured it out that he wanted me to fail just so that he could extend my service so I kinda guessed he must not have told about any of it."

"I didn't know where you were." Hercules said simply with remembered emptiness that had Iolaus wincing with guilt. "And when we ran into each other in Mytilene. . . "

Iolaus had to laugh. "Thank the gods no one was watching."

Hercules chuckled. "Not one of our greatest moments."

"You and me trying to clobber each other in the dark." the hunter shook his head and giggled. "Can you imagine what Jason will say?"

"We," Hercules informed him firmly, placing a hand on his friend's arm "are not going to tell anyone."

"Oh so the mighty Hercules is a little embarrassed that he got blindsided by a mere mortal huh?" Iolaus teased as he fingered the empty cup in his hands.

"The way I remember it, you were the one pinned to the floor." the demigod countered with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, well . . . you got lucky."

"Yeah, right." Hercules caught the cup that Iolaus threw him, placing it back on the bedside table. "Just next time, don't trust my brother, Hades, don't steal from him in the first place okay?" he pleaded putting a hand on his friend's shoulder. Iolaus' eyes locked on his and in that glance a wealth of words and feelings were expressed. The hunter then smiled irreverently.

"Oh so the next time you're on your way to the . . ." his voice dropped to a whisper "B-U-T-C-H--E-R--" Hercules shot him a dirty look and punched him in the arm. "Hey! I'm just trying to be considerate! All my other animals appreciated it!" he insisted with mock indignance as he raised himself to his elbows again.

"Considerate. You still took your pig-- what was her name again?-- there anyways." Hercules teased.

"Penelope, and why should you care." Iolaus countered good-naturedly. "Aren't you the man who's against naming his farm animals?"

"I've developed a . . . new respect for them as of late." Hercules put in vaguely.

"Suuure. Pigs especially, I'll bet." Iolaus said with a laugh as he sat up and grabbed his soft leather breeches from behind him, slipping them on. Then he dug around in his sack on the floor and pulled out his patch-vest and shrugged it on, running his hand appreciatively over the faded old fabric. "Let's go meet Autolycus and Cassandra-- they're still here aren't they?" Hercules nodded "And then lets go fishing."

"So you do want to watch catfish fall." Hercules murmured as he rose to his feet.

Glaring up at the demigod, Iolaus stood. "I don't have the slightest idea what you're talking abouooout!"

"Iolaus!" Hercules managed to catch his friend just before he went pitching over once again.

"I thought you said you gave me the medicine."

"Well, Asclepius didn't know for sure how much it would take. He left another dose just in case." Hercules explained as Iolaus sank back to sit on the bed, the demigod still gripping one arm. Convinced Iolaus had his balance back for the moment, Hercules reached for the vial on the table and poured the rest of it's contents into the cup and filled it with water.

"Ohh no. You said that stuff made me crazy!" the hunter said, shaking his head and holding up his hands in protest

"Iolaus it was only temporary and it will restore your equilibrium, don't ask me how, but Asclepius does know what he's doing."

"I'm surprised he came to help." Iolaus admitted.

"Hermes sent him. Something about wanting a back-up just in case Autolycus got in trouble." Hercules said wryly as he pressed the cup into the hunter's hand.

"Aw Herc, do I have to?"

Hercules eyed his friend sternly. "Drink."

Cassandra and Autolycus were already downstairs sitting at the table in the tiny inn when Iolaus came bounding down the steps two at a time, Hercules at his heels.

Iolaus practically tumbled down the last few, nearly plowing into the table had Hercules not grabbed him first, steadying him.

"Well look who's awake." Cassandra said with a smile. "Good morning Iolaus, Hercules."

"Hi!" Iolaus chirped, bobbing up and down on his feet.

"What's wrong with him?" Autolycus asked warily motioning towards the hyperactive hunter.

"Ah . . . It's the medicine." Hercules explained with a grin still holding onto his friend. "It's made him a little distracted."

"Oh." Autolycus said simply. "Well I still have some things to discuss with shorty if you don't mind."

"Autolycus, now might not be the best time . . ." Hercules began, but was cut of by Iolaus' giggling.

"You're jealous." the blond said pointing at the greenclad kleptomaniac. "You're jealous 'cause I'm the better thief. Because I stole from Ares."

"I-I am not!" Autolycus sputtered.

"Yes you are!" Iolaus countered brightly with a knowing smile.

"I am not! I'm the king of thieves!"

"Are not!" Iolaus disagreed.

"Are too!"

"Oh no." Hercules said covering his eyes with his hand sighing loudly.

"Are not!"

"Are too!

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

Iolaus dangled a very large pendant in front of Autolycus nose. "Are not!" he insisted.

"My pendant! You stole my pendant!" the taller man cried trying to grab it but Iolaus yanked it away. Hercules looked at his friend in amazement. Obviously Hermes' hadn't been lying, Iolaus had never lost his touch.

"Your pendant!" Cassandra repeated angrily rising quickly and pointing an accusatory finger at the thief. "That's Rowan's!"

"It is not!" Autolycus muttered sulkily.

"It is too!" Cassandra said stamping her foot

"Not you two as well." Hercules moaned, throwing his hands up.

"Well he started it." Autolycus said gesturing to Iolaus who was grinning merrily.

"Did not!" the hunter replied.

"You and I are taking this strait back to Mytilene and you will apologize to Mistress Rowan." Cassandra ordered.

"I just did it to teach the old bat a lesson." Autolycus explained quickly, practically whining. "She kept thinking blondie was the King of Thieves. I can't have that! It's bad for my reputation which is bad for

business. C'mon Big Guy, help me out here!"

Hercules merely glared at the thief and then turned to his friend. "Iolaus, can I have the pendant?" he asked carefully not sure how Iolaus would react.

The hunter cocked his head thoughtfully before tossing the stone to the demigod. Hercules let go of the blond and placed the piece of jewelry carefully in Cassandra's hand. Iolaus immediately sank to the floor with a thump. Autolycus merely huffed and sat down, pretending to ignore them all. 

"Hercules, are you sure Iolaus is okay?" Cassandra asked carefully nodding in the hunter' direction as she tucked the pendant in her pouch.

"He'll be fine by tomorrow." Hercules assure her with a hug good-bye. "You take care and keep Autolycus in line."

"Don't worry." she replied with a smile as she picked up her staff. "He wouldn't dare steal from me." 

"Is that a challenge I hear?" Autolycus asked archly turning around, pouting forgotten in an instant.

"Don't even think about it." Cassandra said brandishing her staff.

"Autolycus, I trust you to see here home." Hercules pointed authoritatively at the thief.

Autolycus smoothed his mustache, striking a jaunty pose. "Have no fear Hercules, Cassandra is perfectly safe with me around."

"Yeah but who'll protect me from you?" Cassandra snorted as she turned and left the inn.

"See, she does like me!" Autolycus smiled supremely as he hurried to catch up with the seer.

Hercules watched the two leave, shaking his head in amusement, and then turned back to Iolaus who was still sitting on the floor. Head cocked and staring at his friend, Iolaus held out his hand to his brother.

Hercules grinned and helped his partner to his feet. "Ready to go?" He asked Iolaus.

"Go where? We need to check the parchments." Iolaus reached into his beltpouch searching for Daedalus' scrolls. "And you have to be sneaky. You're not very sneaky Herc."

"Oh really?" Hercules replied smiling fondly as he led his friend out into the sunshine.

"Nope. You're too big to be sneaky. But you can come." Iolaus offered magnanimously.

"Won't I get in the way? Trip all the alarms?" Hercules asked, occasionally reaching out to steady Iolaus as they walked.

"Sure you will! But it's more fun when we do it together." Iolaus said with a brilliant smile.

"Yeah. You're right." Hercules agreed grinning, placing an arm around his brother and giving him a quick hug. "It *_is_* more fun."

end


End file.
